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23 August 2015 @ 11:20 pm
Why not Zoidberg?  
I've talked before about how strange other people's phobias seem—sometimes so strange that you forget anyone could even have that phobia.

Our daughter will be going to UC San Diego this fall, which among other things has a well-respected marine biology institute. We mentioned that, and she said that she'd considered taking a class there, but thought that writing a letter to a professor that said, "I am interested in taking your course, but what are the chances that it might include crustaceans?" would probably be just too weird.

I suggested again that she should try to work on that phobia, and she told me she'd come across a gif on her phone just that morning of a crab with a Putin head running on the beach, and it was the most revolting thing she'd ever seen. It would have to be this, which doesn't strike me as particularly unsettling, but still... \o?

Friday, she told me about a dream she'd had that morning, where she was in an elevator but all of the floors had pictures of food instead of numbers.
Me: Ooh, I'd like to go to the ice cream sundae floor, please.
Daughter: But then I pushed the lobster button by mistake.
Me: Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! The "lobster" button!
Daughter: And the door opened, and there were all these horrible lobsters running across the floor trying to get into the elevator—
Me: HAH-hahahahahahaha!
Daughter: It was the worse nightmare I ever had, worse than the one where I was pregnant and someone was chasing me with a knife.
Me: *wipes eyes* Only you could dream about an elevator with a lobster button...

She turned 18 last week (eighteen!), and our son turned 16 on Friday. He had a friend over Saturday, so I made a decorated cake for him. This has been harder since the days when he played with actual toys, but I don't think this turned out badly:

Eye Of Sauron

I'd have loved to do the eye suspended between that sickle arch on the tower, but couldn't find really good picture of it that made any sense to me.

The next major birthday is mine, in a couple of months. I hope to be off sugar between now and then, because these last few weeks? Argh.

All right, work looms tomorrow. It's all flailing all the time, for most of the last 5-6 years, and it's hard to look forward to that anymore. :(

So, good weekend for everyone?

bleodswean: crafty mommableodswean on August 24th, 2015 01:09 pm (UTC)


Too much fun, really.

What's up with the sugar? And the flailing? How are YOU, K?
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Laugh SPNhalfshellvenus on August 24th, 2015 05:05 pm (UTC)
Wasn't that dream bizarre? And hilarious?

Though honestly, if I imagined an elevator with zoo pictures, where I pushed the tarantula button by mistake, I can see how that would be horrifying. :D

The sugar is a result of just before the Tahoe trip, and of course... the upcoming kids' birthdays. It's like a drug for me, and so I'm gaining back weight I'd lost instead of going the other direction. Kicking sugar altogether is what helps the most.
bleodsweanbleodswean on August 24th, 2015 05:08 pm (UTC)
It was hilarious! And symbolic. I'm impressed with her subconsciousness!

My eldest is that way with sugar. Good luck with that! How's the running/biking?
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Beelzebothalfshellvenus on August 24th, 2015 05:30 pm (UTC)
It was hilarious! And symbolic. I'm impressed with her subconsciousness!
When she first started talking about that dream, I have to admit-- I did not see "lobster button" coming in any way, shape, or form. That was the part that just really cracked me up!

The running/biking is going well--SO much easier when it's in the low 90s (at most) than near or over 100. I made it through all 5 miles of running yesterday, but only 4 of the 5 a week ago.

I'm hoping we have a reasonably wet winter (as in, snowpack and aquifer-restoration, but not flooding), though that always make biking interesting. I'm in S8 of House, M.D., so I need to start looking around for other DVDs to watch in the garage. I keep thinking I might try Supernatural, and see if the early seasons could re-kindle my fanfic writing, but I also know the early seasons pretty well. Diversion is key when you're biking in the garage for 90 minutes at a time. :O
Princess Robot Bubblegum!astrothsknot on August 25th, 2015 05:20 pm (UTC)
watching a series from start to now is really interesting. you see so much more second time around and in a wider context
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on August 25th, 2015 07:19 pm (UTC)
The whole House/Cuddy thing make slightly more sense to me the second time around, in that I could see they were leading up to it earlier in the season that it happened.

Whereas in watching over 6 live seasons, I'd had six years of him being just utterly cruel to her, and that shift in their relationship was like, "You can't just decide to go there without actually supporting it in the writing!"
Kizzyxo_kizzy_xo on August 24th, 2015 01:39 pm (UTC)
I like the cake! I find myself wanting to turn my laptop around to experience it from different angles because the eye works from any perspective :)

Can't help you with the crustacean issue, I'm afraid. See, I've always been fascinated by them as in "I even collect anything crab or lobster themed". Maybe it's their skittering that squicks her out?

No sugar? I have a a LJ/FB friend who's been doing a no-sugar-low-carb thing since May and she's lost, I think, about 40 lbs. My fear with anything like that is...is it humanely reasonable to maintain that as a lifestyle?
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on August 24th, 2015 05:10 pm (UTC)
It turned out that one of the hard things about the cake was trying to translate a photograph into a cake image. I couldn't really get the "cloudy fire" effet as well as I wanted, so it looks more like a dragon's eye to me than the Eye of Sauron.

I think lobsters are both hilarious and delicious, and I kind of get a kick out of them. Crabs less so, though there are a lot of cute crab drawings and figures. I have to imagine that they're an extension of the bug/spider phobia, which I definitely DO have... and so does she.

I think low/no sugar is possible (diabetics are stuck with it), and low carbs as well-- though not "no carbs," which I think is ridiculous.

My "good" diet is low-sugar and low-carb, mainly because it helps the hypoglycemia. Chocolate and other sugar is usually my weakness, and I do love fruit. But I don't eat a lot of bread or starchy things, so that helps.

The Atkins "no carb" thing (where even fibrous vegetables are off-limits!) just doesn't seem sustainable to me. OTOH, vegetarianism wouldn't be sustainable for me either, since I need more protein than most people, and it's hard to get satisfying amounts via a vegetarian diet. :O
mcsassypantsmcsassypants on August 24th, 2015 06:37 pm (UTC)
HA HA! This reminds me of a time in my 20s where I would have these funky dreams when I was stressed out where I would be aware of the room I was in, everything looked normal, like it is when I'm awake, except something unusual would be happening that would cause me to freak out and yell a lot in my sleep.

I woke up one morning to my roommate informing me that I had been freaking out about a lobster that was crawling across our floor.

She told me to go back to sleep because lobsters won't harm you and they're tasty to eat.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Beelzebothalfshellvenus on August 24th, 2015 06:41 pm (UTC)
All of this is true, if it's a normal-sized lobster and you don't have any phobias about them. :)

Things like a co-worker's snake phobia make me think, "But unless it's poisonous or a boa constrictor, what's it going to do to you?" But the same could be said of spiders, where the answer is "Run all over you with their horrible little legs!!!"

Because your own phobias just seem more sensible, even when they're basically the same situation as other people's!

Killer lobsters... chase them with drawn butter, that's the answer!
mcsassypantsmcsassypants on August 24th, 2015 06:48 pm (UTC)
The funny part is that I have absolutely no fear of lobsters, apparently I'm just unnerved when they're where they're not supposed to be (my bedroom).

However, I do share your coworkers fear of snakes. Which my husband found out one day when he tried to get within 10 feet of me with a baby garter snake in his hand. The entire neighborhood probably heard me yelling.
Trigger Warning: Lifematchboximpala on August 25th, 2015 12:12 am (UTC)
That is a very cool cake. Despite your intention to lay off sugar for a while, it did make me wonder -- if someone made you a cake, how would you like it decorated?

a crustacean phobia? really? Clearly, The Little Mermaid is not one of her favorite films....

Now that I think about it, though, crustaceans do have spidery elements to them and I really hate spiders.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on August 25th, 2015 06:29 am (UTC)
I don't have a lot of opinions about the decoration (though "pretty" is always nice).

Mainly, I'd want it to be a chocolate cake with homemade chocolate frosting. *dies*

Clearly, The Little Mermaid is not one of her favorite films....
She saw that years before the phobia developed, so it wasn't an issue then. But I'll bet it would bother her now-- and the crabby crabs in Nemo!

I hate spiders too-- and so does she. Crabs remind me more of spiders than lobsters, by far. My Dad used to call them "sea spiders." Thanks for that, Dad!
Destinadestina on August 25th, 2015 12:57 am (UTC)
The Eye of Sauron is looking pretty tasty! *g*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on August 25th, 2015 06:30 am (UTC)
Thank you!

There's super-moist Devil's Food cake under that frosting. Yum!
cindytsuki_no_bara on August 25th, 2015 01:05 am (UTC)
that's a very cool cake. very eye of sauron-y, even without the tower. also, i look at it and think "mmm, frosting".

i don't have a lobster phobia, but i can see how your daughter's dream might have freaked her out. i mean, a floor full of scuttling dinner can definitely be disturbing. how does she feel about cooked crustaceans? fried shrimp, say. or scampi.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on August 25th, 2015 06:33 am (UTC)
It's hard not to notice the frosting, isn't it? For any kind of multi-color effect like that, I have to do it in layers and put the cake back in the fridge so that the frosting hardens, then take it out and do another color layer. Kind of like oil paints, really.

Um... all crustaceans are inedible, as far as she's concerned. I think she last ate fish sticks sometime before Kindergarten, and that was the end of all forms of fish. She tried shrimp once, years ago, and did not like it... so, it's all off the menu.

She did used to like tunafish sandwiches for awhile, but then it occurred to her that those were also fish, and they became "too weird."

It's maddening. With the hatred of so many flavors and textures, eliminating foods on the basis of "potential weirdness" does not leave much to eat!
Princess Robot Bubblegum!astrothsknot on August 25th, 2015 05:23 pm (UTC)
don't show her the photo of the lobster with a knife
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on August 25th, 2015 07:20 pm (UTC)
Hahaha! That would be the ultimate horror. I think even Patrick Stewart wearing a lobster suit and reclining in a bathtub would just forever ruin PatStew for her rather than make her laugh. :D