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20 October 2014 @ 11:34 am
LJ Idol Season Nine: "Transparency"  
lj idol season nine | week 25 | 1205 words


You can hear them coming through the sky, but it's too late by then. Damn drone-flies see everything. You try hiding and they'll still find you— and they never forget. They know what you look like, what your habits are, and where you like to go.

All that data gets sent to the WorldNet servers, and the bots crawl through it, looking for images and patterns to feed back into the system again. The damn thing's learning.

What it does with that knowledge, we don't know. You ask, and you'll be told you're mistaken—that none of that is really happening. You can't figure out a "why" from something that doesn't exist, so you're obviously imagining things.

They've been saying that for years, but no one actually believes it's true.

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If you enjoyed this story, you can vote for it along with many other fine entries here.

waltzmatildahwaltzmatildah on October 23rd, 2014 04:18 am (UTC)
This is very well crafted and clever :) Great use of the prompt.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on October 23rd, 2014 07:22 pm (UTC)
Thank you very much! That was a nice, wide-open prompt, though it made me think of dystopia almost immediately. But then, I like dystopias. :D
whipchickwhipchick on October 23rd, 2014 06:24 pm (UTC)
Wow. The idea of his inner consciousness still being somewhat aware, but not able to express...that's one of the most terrifying things I can imagine.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on October 23rd, 2014 07:23 pm (UTC)
I think that would be far worse than just being "usurped," because at least you wouldn't be aware of the fact that you were not 'driving' your own body any more. :O
mamas_minionmamas_minion on October 23rd, 2014 07:19 pm (UTC)
Very creepy, I wonder what they did to Ray's brain and the others and why.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Bad Robothalfshellvenus on October 23rd, 2014 07:25 pm (UTC)
I would say that this is a long-term conversion to a controlled population. Those who self-control (from the government's perspective) are find, but those who question or dissent are dangerous.

In the old days, they might just have been killed or jailed, but with newer technology... they're jailed in their own bodies and you've overridden their thinking with your approved version, but you still have useful labor.

I might be creeping myself out by describing it in such cold terms!
blinkyachiru on October 23rd, 2014 09:50 pm (UTC)
Love this!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on October 23rd, 2014 11:54 pm (UTC)
Thank you very much!
favoritebeanfavoritebean on October 23rd, 2014 11:05 pm (UTC)
This was chilling, and very appropriate for Halloween. Reposting, since LJ ate my comment.

Well done!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on October 23rd, 2014 11:55 pm (UTC)
Oh, LJ. I hit a period (before going to Firefox) where I had to copy every comment in case the posting died. It went on _forever_.

Glad you enjoyed this one. :D