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11 May 2011 @ 11:39 pm
Prison Break Slash Fiction: "Kitchen Kink" (Michael/Lincoln, PG-13)  
Title: Kitchen Kink
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Michael/Lincoln (Slash, Crack)
Rating: PG-13
Summary: It's the anti-porn...
Author's Notes: My last Australian Flood-Auction fic for clair_de_lune.
Also for fanfic100 ("Food") and writers_choice ("Meal").


"I've got the whipped cream," Lincoln said. "Anything else?"

"Maybe some strawberries," Michael suggested.

"How about a banana?" Lincoln made a crude gesture with an imaginary fruit.

Michael snorted. "Not unless it's yours."

Lincoln grinned, lost in thought. "Yeah…"

"So, bedroom?" Michael offered, "Or right here on the floor? Lincoln? Lincoln!"

"Huh?" Lincoln snapped back to the present. "Oh. Well, why wait—let's go here."

"All right." Michael pulled his shirt off and lay down.

"Mmmm." Lincoln kneeled down next to him and ran his hand across Michael's chest and stomach. "Perfect."

Michael closed his eyes in anticipation, a smile curving his lips. He heard Lincoln shake the can of whipped cream and—


"What?" Lincoln looked confused.

"That stuff's freezing!"

"Well yeah, Michael—it's been in the fridge."

"Hmm," Michael grumbled. He was determined not to spoil the mood, especially when they'd barely gotten started. "Keep going." He tensed his stomach muscles and willed himself not to flinch.

Lincoln blasted him a few more times (That had better not be a smiley face, Michael thought), then leaned in to lap at Michael's skin with tantalizing caresses of his tongue.

"Nice…" Michael stroked along Lincoln's neck and shoulders, enjoying Lincoln's lazy attentions.

"Strawberries?" Lincoln murmured.


Lincoln placed a strawberry between Michael's lips, and Michael's hand went to it automatically to hold the stem. He bit off the bottom and chewed it happily.

"Not like that!" Lincoln said. "We're supposed to eat it together."


Lincoln put another strawberry in Michael's mouth, and leaned down to nibble at it. Michael made a muffled noise of protest, and Lincoln pulled back. "Now what?"

"The juice is sliding down my neck!"

Lincoln sighed. "Back to the whipped cream it is…"

This time, the cream felt warmer. It was warmer—warm enough to drip down Michael's side with slow, slimy surety.


"Don’t worry, I'll take care of it," Lincoln said. He sipped and licked at the pools and trails of it on Michael's body.

Apart from the stickiness, it felt kind of good, which was why it took Michael awhile to notice that Lincoln had suddenly slowed down.

"Something wrong?" Michael asked.

"I, uh… I don't feel so good."

"You're kidding."

"No…" Lincoln groaned. He rolled onto his back and squeezed his eyes shut. "Go on without me."

"This isn't a war movie, Lincoln. And this whole thing was supposed to be mutual, anyway."

"Mutual?" Lincoln waved the can of whipped cream at him weakly. "Try eating half of this. You'll catch up."

"That's disgusting. So that's it? We're done?"

Lincoln just groaned again, and let the can of whipped cream fall out of his hand and onto the floor.

"Fine. I'm taking a shower." Michael got to his feet, careful not to roll into anything along the way. He walked to the doorway, and paused to survey the disaster before delivering his final shot: "And the thing you planned for tomorrow, with the leather handcuffs and the feather?"


"Yeah," he confirmed. "Forget it."

-------- fin --------

Clair de Lune: pb - brothers4clair_de_lune on May 13th, 2011 08:56 pm (UTC)
Oh my, you did write it! And it's a wonderful demonstration of why I left the whipped cream in the fridge despite the prompt *g*
I love the succession of small, or not so small, hindrances. Crackastic, maybe, but realistic nonetheles. Plus Michael fussy about strawberry juice and sticky whipped cream and so fast to hit the shower after they called off everything? Just like him. I also have a big soft spot for Michael eating the strawberry and for the war movie quote - I may have snorted at the "This isn't a war movie, Lincoln" line.

"Not like that!" Lincoln said. "We're supposed to eat it together."
Um, would Michael have a "being fed" kink? *g*

Very funny ficlet. I loved it. Thank you :)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: PB slashhalfshellvenus on May 14th, 2011 06:25 am (UTC)
The wonderful awfulness of the idea was impossible to resist!

Fussy Michael always cracks me up, and to try so hard to look beyond the "ickiness" and just go with it is completely like him, too. But easier said than done. ;)

I didn't even think about a "being fed" kink (that would definitely be another anti-kink for me). Mostly, I was aiming at the usual thing where lovers are nibbling at something delictable and wind up nibbling each other. IF they can wait...

I hope this was cracktastic enough for you, and I'm glad you mentioned that prompt. What a great idea!
Clair de Lune: origami - canardclair_de_lune on May 14th, 2011 10:37 am (UTC)
I didn't even think about a "being fed" kink (that would definitely be another anti-kink for me). Mostly, I was aiming at the usual thing where lovers are nibbling at something delictable and wind up nibbling each other.

Oh, no worries, I did read it that way. Sorry, poorly worded comment: I was just joking, and maybe mocking Michael a bit for being oblivious of the "rules". Not to mention that Michael being Michael, Lincoln could never get it rigth anyway: too small bites, too big bites, too fast, not enough of this, too much of that... *g*
Now I'm thinking about it, I wrote a tiny bit of food play for a Michael/Sara/Lincoln fic a few years ago, but I kept it as un-messy as possible - which is probably ruining part of the fun if you do like the kink.

What a great idea!

Great execution of it ;)