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19 January 2010 @ 11:17 pm
Burn Notice Fiction: "Schemes, Scams, And Schoolboy Loyalties" (Sam, Michael, PG)  
Title: Schemes, Scams, and Schoolboy Loyalties
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Sam, Michael (Gen)
Rating: PG
Summary: Friends stick by you in the bad times, even if it's just to make fun of it all later.
Author's Notes: For badboy_fangirl, who wanted Michael and Sam doing what they do.
Also for writers_choice, this is "Memories."

x-x-x-x-x

"So Michael, what's this piña colada yogurt doing in your fridge?"

Michael's past life as an agent had been even wilder than Sam's, but after getting stuck in Miami, his kitchen now offered little more than cereal, beer and blueberry yogurt. Sam didn't think it was humanly possible for anyone to love blueberry yogurt that much, but he'd seen Michael eat it, and the whole thing looked very sincere.

Maybe Michael was making up for spending too many years overseas in the company of dangerous dairy products and a diet based on chickpeas, garlic, and goats.

"What?" Michael came out of the bathroom, drying off his face. "I was in the shower."

"Piña colada—what's that about?"

"Oh. I thought you might like it—you and Fi are over often enough that I should probably have some variety on hand."

Sam shook his head. "Yogurt." He opened one of the cupboards. "So soup and crackers and bread and meat never occurred to you?"

Michael sat down at the table and opened a folder. "Supermarket's a mile that way," he said. "You want something different, you know where to find it." He picked up a photo, eyeing it warily. "I can't believe Carla wants me to resurrect this identity."

"What, with the porn-stache and that godawful suit?" Sam leaned in for a closer look. He frowned. "Not exactly your best work, Mikey…"

Michael rolled his eyes. "What about your retired bus-driver cover, Stanley-something, who dresses worse than you do? And anyway, the rich loser thing was the whole point of that ID—too much money and too little sense. The guy draws con men like a dictatorship draws death squads."

Sam chuckled suddenly. "You remember last summer, with the thing?"

"Thing."

"Where I was the first-born Nazi son, and you brokered a deal…"

"Oh, yeah. It almost fell through the first time you opened your mouth. Your German was rusty."

Sam shrugged. "It happens." He opened the fridge again and took out a beer. "Though at least I didn't kick off an international incident by insulting the Turkish ambassador—to his face."

"You always have to bring that up. Those Middle-Eastern languages are tough—and that was my third one in two months. You try keeping all those overlapping words straight!"

"No thanks," Sam said. "Got plenty to keep me busy here." He nodded at Michael's file. "New case?"

"Old business. More of a bureaucratic blackmail situation."

"So how long're you going to let Carla keep yanking your leash?"

"Until I find out who or what got me burned. Or she steps in front of a bus."

Sam pointed his beer at Michael thoughtfully. "You know, I'll bet Stanley had some friends in the bus-driving business…"

"Can't do it," Michael said. "Besides, you assassinate inside the agency and it's all over. They'll hunt you down."

"So you're going to break out old—"

"Rudy."

"Old Rudy again, and—seriously? King Loser is Rudy? I'm embarrassed already…"

Michael spread out the remainder of the file's contents. "I could really use your help on this, Sam. God knows what Carla's up to. It'd be good to have someone else close to the action, just in case."

Sam thought about all the two of them had been through over the years, everything from shared missions and trading off favors to the way Michael had forgiven him for selling weak intel on him to the FBI awhile back.

What the hell.

"I think Rudy needs an accountant," he finally said.


-------- fin --------

 
 
 
sassy, classy, and a bit smart-assy: Allgoodbadboy_fangirl on January 20th, 2010 06:20 pm (UTC)
Tomorrow night we'll have real new Sam and Michael, but I don't think it could be anymore authentic than this. So good. i really like it from Sam's POV--I'm sure I've never read a fic from his side.

Very, very good. I'm not really smart enough to write scenes like this, but you are just brilliant.

"Though at least I didn't kick off an international incident by insulting the Turkish ambassador—to his face."

"You always have to bring that up. Those Middle-Eastern languages are tough—and that was my third one in two months. You try keeping all those overlapping words straight!"


SO GREAT. LOL! Can't wait for tomorrow night!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 20th, 2010 07:07 pm (UTC)
I'm still on S3x03! We haven't caught up with last season yet. Of course, again, we don't have cable...

I actually DID write another ficlet from Sam's POV, for that 10-character meme. Lincoln got three appearances in the meme (including a brief one with Greg House), and he's the other character in the Sam story here. Kind of got me used to writing from Sam's POV. :)

Given what Michael has hung onto from his spy days, I figure he must have covered a lot of ground and he clearly did it well. Imagine the languages and customs to keep straight, not to mention all of the "players" in any given assignment!

I'm glad you enjoyed this-- "authentic" is SO wonderful to hear in fandoms I don't really write-- and I hope the new season is as good as the last. :D
sassy, classy, and a bit smart-assy: MikeFikissbadboy_fangirl on January 20th, 2010 11:16 pm (UTC)
OMG, I can't wait for you to get to the "fall finale." It was AWESOME! You'll have to post when you get there and tell me what you thought of it. It's the episode where Michael has an Irish accent!

I'm off to read the other Sam story!
brigid_tannerbrigid_tanner on January 20th, 2010 08:05 pm (UTC)
Sounds just like them. :)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 20th, 2010 09:28 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much!

I love it when the two of them get going-- Sam really cracks me up.
lizbet0lizbet0 on January 20th, 2010 10:02 pm (UTC)
I have really missed Burn Notice, so it was a treat to read this! You've done a very good job capturing the teasing (and the likely variety of previous IDs for these two!) Now if Fi just shows up and says she likes the porn-stache...! ;-D
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 20th, 2010 11:08 pm (UTC)
I love the interplay between the characters on this show. Sam's actually my favorite, mainly because he's the funniest.

I can just see Fi saying that-- either because it's true (Fi's unpredictable like that) or just because she knows it would bother Sam. ;)

Thanks for reading!
petunia846: BN-Suitspetunia846 on January 20th, 2010 10:18 pm (UTC)
Nice work :)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 20th, 2010 11:08 pm (UTC)
Thank you! It's such a fun show to work with. :)
Hematite Badgerhematitebadger on January 20th, 2010 10:21 pm (UTC)
This made me smile. It's very cute, and so perfectly them that I wanted to hug it.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 20th, 2010 11:12 pm (UTC)
Your comment made ME smile! I adore the characters on this show, and how they remain close and loyal to each other in an "every man for himself" business. :)
In here, everything is beautiful...: (bn) sam is an exposition specialistrise_your_dead on January 21st, 2010 03:37 am (UTC)
That's wonderful! So very them, and the little details (past covers and missions, the yogurt) make it. Good work!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 21st, 2010 04:07 am (UTC)
Yay! So glad you enjoyed it!

And you've got the Sam icon to match, too. :D
In here, everything is beautiful...: (bn) sam is an exposition specialistrise_your_dead on January 24th, 2010 09:47 am (UTC)
Hee, thanks! I sort of fell in love with it when I saw it and thought 'hey, it's pretty perfect for use on a ficjournal, isn't it?"
Redneckgeek: mike on the run bn-andrea19 by anakaliaacourtberger on January 21st, 2010 04:42 am (UTC)
Wow incredible job and I can just say thank you for writing new fic!! Especially a fic with Sam and Mike, so what I needed tonight! This was like watching episode, loved it, and it's something I can definitely see them doing. Absolutely wonderful work.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 21st, 2010 06:42 am (UTC)
So glad you enjoyed it! The banter on this show-- including all the references to weird things in the past-- is one of the things I love most about it. The fact that something like this could even BE a normal conversation for Michael and Sam is a big part of why I got hooked on the show to begin with.

Thanks for reading!
Viva: Burn Notice Flamingochapter_stork on January 21st, 2010 11:25 am (UTC)
Oh, what a treat this is! Great interaction between these two.

I particularly enjoyed the "last summer, with the thing" and Michael's deadpan response -- "Thing."

I miss these guys, although not for much longer. Thanks for this!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 21st, 2010 06:17 pm (UTC)
I can so easily see Sam resorting to that kind of conversational shorthand, even though (for all three characters) there are a LOT of "things" that could potentially be. Sometimes one or more per week!

Glad to help you through the last part of the hiatus. :)

Gorgeous icon, BTW. The pink flamingos really put the finishing touch on, colorwise!
oxoniensis: fandom: bn the truth hurtsoxoniensis on January 22nd, 2010 07:49 am (UTC)
That was fun! They definitely know way too much about each other. *g*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 22nd, 2010 08:12 am (UTC)
They definitely know way too much about each other. *g*

Both by shared adventures and by leaks of unfortunate information about less-than-ideal missions. ;)

Glad you enjoyed this! :D
Seiberwingseiberwing on January 25th, 2010 11:04 pm (UTC)
Happy little banter scene, the kind I love most in this show. You've got the tone down perfect.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on January 30th, 2010 05:04 am (UTC)
Thank you so much! I love the interplay between the characters on this show-- the wit, the sarcasm, the affection under everything else. And the conversations that start out normal and drift in and out of weird at a moment's notice. :)
labseraphlabseraph on February 10th, 2010 09:10 am (UTC)
BWAHAHAHAHA!

I didn't know that you write Burn Notice fic as well *mental note to check Venus' LJ more often*.

Fantastique!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Random Fandomhalfshellvenus on February 11th, 2010 01:49 am (UTC)
Glad you enjoyed it! I don't really write it, except for that birthday offering in November and something that came out of a meme.

Really, the December "10 characters, 15 words" meme led to a whole new explosion of random-fandoms. :0