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18 September 2009 @ 11:46 pm
Supernatural Slash Drabble: "Sweet Talk" (Crack, PG)  
Title: Sweet Talk
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Bobby/Rufus (Slash, Drabble, Crack)
Rating: PG
Summary: Like two crabby-ass peas in a pod…
Author's Notes: There is NO excuse for this one. I'm fated to write the things I joke about, it seems.
For supernatural100 ("Aggravation") and spn_drabble ("Fireworks").

x-x-x-x-x

Bobby first met Rufus at a farmhouse, hunting the same ghost as him. They stomped around each other, acting tough, but wound up burning the bones together and sharing a bottle of whiskey on the back of Rufus' truck.

"Not bad," Rufus grunted. "Seen worse."

"Not bad?" Bobby snorted. "I've forgotten more Sumerian than you'll ever know, ya idjit."

"Cracker."

"Moron."

Rufus' eyes lit up. "Damn, that talk just gets me going."

"Yeah?"

Rufus pushed Bobby down into the truck bed, teeth dancing along his neck. "Redneck soldier."

Bobby growled. "While we're young, jackass. Stop tip-toeing around."

So they did.


-------- fin --------

 
 
tokenblkgirl: Supernatural: Sexy Deantokenblkgirl on September 19th, 2009 06:55 am (UTC)
LOLOL! OMG, I think I squeed when I saw this posted. I love those guys and this just made my night.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Laugh SPNhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 06:58 am (UTC)
Yayyyy! I joked about it in a comment on destina's journal, that somebody had probably already written this.

And then I thought, "The hell they have." And I just could not help myself. They're so much alike these too, and there's something about turning that crankiness into a kind of foreplay that was too good to pass up. :0
cindy: spn - bobby (by vornieicons)tsuki_no_bara on September 19th, 2009 07:01 am (UTC)
crabby-ass peas in a pod! heee. i love that they get hot by being all cranky and insulting at each other.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Laugh SPNhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 07:07 am (UTC)
There's a certain similarity between these two, and the idea of them being trash-talking soulmates was too funny not to write. :D
Who'da thought, baby? We're civilians.dugindeep on September 19th, 2009 07:02 am (UTC)
HAH. I don't know why, but namecalling is aces in my book. Good job!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Laugh SPNhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 07:08 am (UTC)
:D These two are definitely of like mind on that count! I'm not sure they know any other way to communicate, which makes them perfect for each other. :D
The Huntresshuntress69 on September 19th, 2009 07:04 am (UTC)
I love you! And now that you have corrupted me, I may have to hint at them in anything I write that takes place after John went away, cause, you know, I love John/Bobby. But I could so see them.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 07:08 am (UTC)
Haha! There's actually a "mutual irritation dynamic" in both of those pairings that totally works for me, even just as humor!
never trust a big butt and a smile: bobby mine is an evil laughobeetaybee on September 19th, 2009 07:38 am (UTC)
Ha. Just the disclaimer on this made me snort out loud. Very, very fun! The old coots!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Laugh SPNhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 07:44 am (UTC)
Given their incredibly similar short-tempered, cranky personalities, they suddenly seemed very well-suited to each other!

They definitely understand each other!
mercurybard on September 19th, 2009 07:47 am (UTC)
You win many things. Possibly life.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Laugh SPNhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 07:54 am (UTC)
Hee! But am I forfeiting my sanity in the process? :0
(no subject) - mercurybard on September 21st, 2009 05:02 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Jas Masson: eye of the tigerjasmasson on September 19th, 2009 08:01 am (UTC)
Ahahaha! You are so fantastic!

Rufus and Bobby are so great. *hearts*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 08:07 am (UTC)
I love those two, and I'd bet most of their conversations sound about like that minus the sex. They're mind-twins, both suffering their way through a world filled with dumbass fools who're always getting in the way.

Clearly, they're made for each other!
moodswingersmoodswingers on September 19th, 2009 10:52 am (UTC)
Hee, this is awesome. :)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Laugh SPNhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 06:49 pm (UTC)
Thank you! It's the "wrong" that just keeps on giving. ;)
shaitanah: spike_quoteshaitanah on September 19th, 2009 12:14 pm (UTC)
LMAO, this is cool! XDDD All the name-calling... XDDD
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 06:49 pm (UTC)
Fits right in with you icon, some how-- the snark rules!

Or in Bobby and Rufus' case, the impatience and insults rule! :0
gunznammo2gunznammo2 on September 19th, 2009 03:22 pm (UTC)
Funny and hot in a strange sorta way. Love my veteran hunters - nice to see they get to have a bit of 'down' time. :)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Laugh SPNhalfshellvenus on September 19th, 2009 06:50 pm (UTC)
I tell you, getting these two guys to a "first time" in a 100 words was a real challenge!

But it may be less cracky and more "true" than I intended. :0

Edited at 2009-09-19 06:51 pm (UTC)
Deadbeat Nymph: sam dean one for sammydeadbeat_nymph on September 19th, 2009 10:25 pm (UTC)
Holy crap! I clicked on this automatically without really reading the header notes and was expecting Sam/Dean! LOL!

This was a lovely surprise and something I hadn't ever considered. And "I've forgotten more Sumerian than you'll ever know, ya idjit." made me laugh out loud; it's so Bobby to say something like that, and probably also entirely true. :D
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on September 20th, 2009 05:29 am (UTC)
I know, as if I'd write any other SPN slash pairings! Except when the crackwagon kidnaps me. ;)

it's so Bobby to say something like that, and probably also entirely true. :D

:D That phrase about "not suffering fools gladly" clearly applies to Bobby, and I'm pretty sure it applies to Rufus, too. Imagine that having more of a "kindred spirits" effect than an antagonizing effect, and you can see where it leads. 0
happy is as happy does: LMAO - SPNhappywriter06 on September 20th, 2009 05:13 am (UTC)
"Cracker."
That shouldn't crack me up so much.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on September 20th, 2009 05:32 am (UTC)
You can hit Bobby with all the stereotypes you want, but he's smart underneath that getup, so most of them can't stick.

For his own part, Bobby just universally assumes that other people are idjits. I suspect he assumes it about virtually any other person on the planet, in fact. Must be a rare day when someone's intellect and sense actually impress him. ;0
(Deleted comment)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Supernaturalhalfshellvenus on October 27th, 2010 12:05 am (UTC)
You see how it starts out as crack, and then by the end you're thinking, "Well, you know, I could actually see this being possible"?

The all-Bobby episode just confirmed the whole idea for me. Those two are so much alike it's scary, and what's even funnier is how much the parts that are just like themselves irritates them both. ;)
asmodexusasmodexus on November 3rd, 2010 04:54 am (UTC)
I simply love it.
XD I actually went hunting for this pairing and I am glad some body out there wrote it.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on November 3rd, 2010 05:28 pm (UTC)
Hee! It started out as a joke, after the episode in Season 5 where the two of them were just irritating each other like blazes.

But by the time I'd finished writing it, it seemed less like Crack than some kind of match-made-in-a-poker-room kind of truth!
(no subject) - asmodexus on November 3rd, 2010 07:20 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on November 3rd, 2010 09:12 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - asmodexus on November 3rd, 2010 10:15 pm (UTC) (Expand)