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24 January 2009 @ 12:42 pm
Supernatural Gen Drabble: "Not Fade Away" (Sam and Dean, PG)  
Title: Not Fade Away
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Sam and Dean (Gen, Drabble )
Rating: PG
Summary (4x12 Coda): A future should be more than everything just ending.
Author's Notes: For supernatural100, this is "Change."

x-x-x-x-x

He should've expected Dean's answer, but it still stings. Sam knows there's no "after" for most hunters, but Dean says it so bleakly, so hopelessly. Like he's already given up.

With a life like this—lived for other people, always heading for the next town, the next danger—there has to be some point where you finally choose yourself. Sam can't say when that should happen, with the world always needing them, but he has to believe that time will come.

Lilith, Ruby says, and Sam listens.

Destroy Lilith, and he'll finally have given enough of himself to walk away.


-------- fin --------

 
 
 
shaitanah: castielshaitanah on January 24th, 2009 09:18 pm (UTC)
This episode has nearly made my cry. Beautiful drabble, corresponding so well to the ideas of this ep. <3
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Samhalfshellvenus on January 24th, 2009 09:27 pm (UTC)
I really didn't expect the episode to end the way it did, and it has me worried!

But this drabble is all about understanding Sam's choice.

Thanks so much for reading!
brigid_tanner: Sam-powerfulbrigid_tanner on January 24th, 2009 09:29 pm (UTC)
Love that Sam still has hope if he can just get rid of Lillith that they'll have a happy every after.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Samhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:03 pm (UTC)
He knows Dean has considered getting out of the whole thing, and the idea that if he could stop the cause of the mass unsealing it would be enough... that's so purely Sam, to have to feel now that his sacrifice is sufficient.
gunznammo2gunznammo2 on January 24th, 2009 09:58 pm (UTC)
I still see a slippery slope for our Sammy boy if he keeps up this shit. This statement is purely from a Mom's point of view, of course. I sure do love our boys! Just wish they'd stick together more. They're stronger that way.....

'Lillith, Ruby says, and Sam listens.' A one-track mind is nothing new for that kid. Poor Sammy... Poor Dean!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:06 pm (UTC)
I still see a slippery slope for our Sammy boy if he keeps up this shit.
Oh, me too-- though I hope not to see that happen. I want more for these two than for Kripke to continually torture them, you know?

But he's placing far too much reliance on Ruby's identification of what's "bad" and "dangerous." We still can't know what Ruby's longterm plan is, so what if she's just stringing him along the right path until they finally reach the place she's been waiting for all along to finally get him to do the wrong thing? *is worried*

Bogwitchbogwitch on January 24th, 2009 10:38 pm (UTC)
I nice look into Sam's head, though I think he should have anticipated the answer.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Samhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:07 pm (UTC)
Thank you!

though I think he should have anticipated the answer.
Me too, because it's Dean after all, and he knows how Dean is (and he's been hearing this same form of Dean for the better part of the last 3 years).

But he still seemed surprised by it, and that's how Sam is, to always have that little bit of hope.
maharetr: Sam&Deanmaharetr on January 25th, 2009 12:44 am (UTC)
Oh, both of them! Sam for having hope, Dean for having none... *hands*

This is a fabulous look inside Sam's head. Thank you!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:08 pm (UTC)
Oh, both of them! Sam for having hope, Dean for having none... *hands*
I love the contrasts between these two, which is why I was happy to see this moment in the show.

They are of such different minds, and the way they interact (both when they're cooperating and when they aren't) is such an endless source of fascination for me.

So glad you enjoyed this. Thanks for commenting!
cindy: spn - emo sammy (by nyaubaby)tsuki_no_bara on January 25th, 2009 02:19 am (UTC)
aw, sammy. :( this makes sense, tho. i totally buy that he thinks getting rid of lilith will solve all his problems.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:10 pm (UTC)
i totally buy that he thinks getting rid of lilith will solve all his problems.
Or at least that it will solve the main problem of what's happening with the Seals (which is huge, and so much bigger than any one or two hunters or angels can control).

And after that... he and Dean (and their father) have all given enough to "the cause" for several lifetimes over.
(Deleted comment)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:10 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much, Rinne! :)
(Deleted comment)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:11 pm (UTC)
Oh, me too. Dean is so defeatist that he really has no ability to survive anything long-term.

You have to have hope in order to really bring about that kind of change.
cutedevil666: Winchesteroncarcutedevil666 on January 25th, 2009 04:01 am (UTC)
Great little fic!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:12 pm (UTC)
Thank you very much! :D
tidal_racetidal_race on January 25th, 2009 11:21 am (UTC)
I like this motivation so much. I'm almost afraid to watch the show anymore. They're probably going to make Sam dark and they way they seem to be doing it is just not something I believe.

This though, fits so perfectly. If he destroys Lillith he's fought the epic battle, the one no one else can or will win, and if he survives that, his duty is done.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on January 25th, 2009 08:17 pm (UTC)
I'm almost afraid to watch the show anymore. They're probably going to make Sam dark and they way they seem to be doing it is just not something I believe.
I sure hope not, because I don't want to see that either. :(

If he destroys Lilith he's fought the epic battle, the one no one else can or will win, and if he survives that, his duty is done.
Yes, and this seems very much like Sam to me. I can understand his thinking entirely here, even though I worry that he's nowhere near strong enough to destroy Lilith and that Ruby might be ultimately playing him. But Sam's not seeing that right now, and in his mind what he's doing makes perfect sense.
devon99 on January 26th, 2009 08:11 pm (UTC)
Oh Sammy, still so hopeful. It's all going to end so badly, isn't it?

Lovely drabble, as always:)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on January 27th, 2009 08:06 pm (UTC)
It's all going to end so badly, isn't it?
I sure hope not, but we all know how Kripke is! *bites nails*

Thanks so much for reading!