?

Log in

No account? Create an account
 
 
13 February 2006 @ 09:36 pm
Prison Break Fan Fiction: "Sacrifices" (Michael, Lincoln, PG)  
Title: Sacrifices
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Lincoln, Michael (Gen)
Rating: PG
Summary: Lincoln’s eyes witness every sacrifice Michael has made for him.
Author's Notes: Written for fanfic100 and prisonbreak100, where I have the pairing of Lincoln and Michael. This one is Gen, to fit in both universes, and was written for prompt #5, “Outsides.” For slash readers only, it can be considered to follow The Shape of Freedom.

x-x-x-x-x

In an out-of-the-way part of Mississippi, Michael and Lincoln have stopped for the night.

They are making their way south, covering as much ground as possible in the dull, dependable sedan Michael had kept in a storage locker. His supplies had included gas and bottled water, sleeping bags and a tent. There was enough food and changes of clothes to keep from having to buy things more than a couple of times before crossing the border. Not being seen or noticed is paramount to their survival, and cutting down on the opportunities for that was one of Michael’s smartest moves yet.

The tent keeps the mosquitoes away as the brothers lie on top of the sleeping bags in the humid night. Michael is already asleep, still sweating in his underwear. The window flaps are open for the hope of a late breeze.

By lantern light, Lincoln is still thinking. He has slept every moment he wasn’t driving, drugged to exhaustion by the sudden lack of constant, agonizing stress. Their worries are not over, but he is no longer waiting in his cage like an animal about to be slaughtered. The relief was so great at first that he could barely stay awake. Now, with the initial shock behind him, he has time to observe and to reflect.

His brother’s face is tilted toward the light, and Lincoln is remembering the Michael of long ago. Asleep, the intensity leaves Michael’s face. All that remains is the sweetness that is such a part of who his brother is. When his intellect is silent and his logic is stilled, the lasting empathy tells every secret that Michael hides. His choices and his kindness are more driven by this part of himself than Michael could ever admit. Without this irresistible pull of love and loyalty, Lincoln would have given up on himself a long time ago.

Michael slowed his descent into self-destruction as a teenager. Now he has brought him this new future Lincoln never should have had. Words can never express how grateful Lincoln is, how astonished and undeserving-- but he knows he has to try to tell Michael again and again.

Michael’s hand lies softly between them, and Lincoln follows its line up to Michael’s shoulders and back. A tapestry of images covers everything, so much beauty in the details and so much darkness in the larger effect. These tattoos are so unlike Michael that Lincoln’s breath catches every time he truly looks at them. They belong to a much harder and more aggressive man. That they cover the soft skin and tender heart of the gentlest man Lincoln has ever known is so wrong he can barely stand it.

Michael did this for him. He did it to make sure that no single forgotten path or aspect would endanger their escape from prison. This sacrifice will mark his brother forever, and Lincoln cannot look any more without feeling that he and prison – and the tattoos themselves-- have obliterated his brother’s innocence beyond repair.

He turns his face away then, back to a moment when his little brother’s hand inside his own flowed into the tint of freckles instead of ink. But Lincoln knows that even after he moved out Michael was still hanging onto him, still pulled by the invisible threads of devotion. That hand never left his, not really, and this situation—snaking through the country as scarred and endangered fugitives-- is where Lincoln led them both.

He rolls his neck and sighs a little. There is no way to pretend that all of this is not his fault. The path from that first wrong step to this life of endless running is vivid before the power of hindsight. He can see the trail backwards to the beginning in a single second. If only he could have known it going forward…

Michael sleeps on, and Lincoln’s gaze drifts down those legs to the last unspeakable injury, barely visible in the semi-darkness. This is no trick of the shadows, this blur where flesh should be. That elegant foot, forever ruined by the brutal absence of those toes, is the starkest reminder of all that Michael has endured. It will hinder him with every step, and it will shame him into self-consciousness—this symbol of the betrayal of decency that should make him proud instead.

This harshest of Michael’s outer scars hurts Lincoln more than anything.

He feels the briefest cowardly urge to run away from it all, to escape the evidence of his own sins staring back at him from Michael’s mutilated body. But that would destroy his brother—after everything else they’ve survived—and he owes him so much more than that. After all Michael has given him, now and all those years ago, it is Lincoln’s turn to take care of him again. Michael needs his love returned in full measure, and a depth of loyalty that means Lincoln will not leave. He needs the constancy and stability that has always wavered under his touch, and he needs to know that Lincoln will work to live a different life for him— that Michael is worth that, and always was even when Lincoln failed.

Michael needs to know that Lincoln admires him, that he became more than Lincoln ever would have dreamed.

Above all, Lincoln thinks his little brother was braver than he could ever be himself.

Tomorrow, he will find a way to say that.


-------- fin --------

Slash readers only: continue on to the next story




 
 
 
The Good, The Bad and The Lana: brothers b&wthelana on February 14th, 2006 07:06 am (UTC)
Much, much love.

Especially this part:

These tattoos are so unlike Michael that Lincoln’s breath catches every time he truly looks at them. They belong to a much harder and more aggressive man. That they cover the soft skin and tender heart of the gentlest man Lincoln has ever known is so wrong he can barely stand it.

I have always loved the idea of "what now?". What exactly does Michael expect to happen afterwards? Does he really think that scuba shop in Panama is going to be it? Or more like that him and Linc will go their seperate ways again one day, each one of them with their own family (or at least Lincoln with his). How does he expect Lincoln to deal with the guilt he has hanging over his head if he does not expect them to stick together after the break out).

Randomly? You still have to do a "first time on the outside" fic ;)

Also? Really loved you mentioning Linc's psychology/sleeping pattern on the outside.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Lincoln by always2nlhalfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 07:11 am (UTC)
Does he really think that scuba shop in Panama is going to be it?
Was I snoozing during an episode, or out of the room? I keep hearing "Panama=>scuba-shop" and thinking, No... that's silly. Did Michael actually say that on the show? If he did, he must have been kidding about the scuba shop.

Randomly? You still have to do a "first time on the outside" fic ;)
In the slash sense? I'll stick it in the list. Hey, this one finally made it out-- it's been on my list for 6-8 weeks. Got the urge to write it today.

Also? Really loved you mentioning Linc's psychology/sleeping pattern on the outside.
It just seemed so realistic to me, that the letdown of stress and anxiety would hit him with a sense of exhaustion. Escaping from Death Row within days/hours of your execution? Who expects that to actually happen?

Are you pleased with the offering? ;D
(no subject) - thelana on February 14th, 2006 07:20 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 07:30 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - thelana on February 14th, 2006 07:36 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 06:06 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - thelana on February 14th, 2006 06:11 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 06:48 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - thelana on February 14th, 2006 06:52 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - thelana on February 14th, 2006 07:46 am (UTC) (Expand)
faithinfaithfaithinfaith on February 14th, 2006 07:54 am (UTC)
Stories where people are pounding their guilt often has a way of ending up pretty sappy, which isn't always is a bad thing, but still it's refreshing to read something that's not. Beacuse this isn't. Even with all the angst and guilty consense, I'm not even close to tears, instead I find myself nodding repeatedly in agreement.

Lincon is right about everything and I'm feeling a strange feeling of proud, hearing him saying it, admitting it, but most of all for realizing the greatness (or whatever the right word in English could be.) of Micheal's sacrefice. Like I was his mother or something. LOL And when it ends with "Tomorrow, he will find a way to say that." I'm convinced he will and not just any way, but the right one. :)

Again great work! (this comment starting to get really old but I can't think of anything better. ;)

But before I go there's two more lines that I think shows your excellent writing abilities.

This: "Asleep, the intensity leaves Michael’s face. All that remains is the sweetness that is such a part of who his brother is. When his intellect is silent and his logic is stilled, the lasting empathy tells every secret that Michael hides."

Asleep, we are true and wounerable and this describes this in a wonderful way.

And this: "That hand never left his, not really, and this situation—snaking through the country as scarred and endangered fugitives-- is where Lincoln led them both. "

With one sentence you showed us all why we have to be careful were we lead the ones we love and it's writing when it's at is best. :)


The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Lincoln by always2nlhalfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 06:33 pm (UTC)
of Micheal's sacrefice. Like I was his mother or something. LOL
No, I know exactly what you mean :) That sacrifice should never be taken for granted.

Asleep, we are true and wounerable and this describes this in a wonderful way.
And the part of Michael that is consistently the key, once the "noise" is stripped away.

With one sentence you showed us all why we have to be careful were we lead the ones we love.
This one was very important. It's as with parents and children-- they may follow where you do not intend, or after you think they've stopped paying attention. Leaving Michael never meant that Michael let go of him.

So very glad you enjoyed this, and I always appreciate your thoughtful comments :)
(no subject) - faithinfaith on February 14th, 2006 06:42 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 06:50 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - faithinfaith on February 14th, 2006 06:54 pm (UTC) (Expand)
PamalaXpamalax on February 14th, 2006 02:03 pm (UTC)
Wonderful
Just the stuff I'm always out there looking for. Really wonderful work!!

But hey I bet you knew in the back of your head I was going to go crazy for this one ;D

I'm doing this a bit odd this time. Since you have always been kind enough to let me archive your work I'm snagging this one for my page now, because I'm doing an update right now, and if you find you'd rather I didn't archive I'll just go back and pull it out.

Thanks for the beautiful work
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 06:37 pm (UTC)
Re: Wonderful
But hey I bet you knew in the back of your head I was going to go crazy for this one ;D
I suspected you would, but you just never know :) It has a lot of the themes in it that you like-- love, devotion, loyalty, self-sacrifice. SelfLESSness on Michael's part.

Did you miss If Only from last week? Also seems like your type of fic, although not the same flavor as this one. And don't overlook the older ones-- that's what my fic page is for! (it's my LJ homepage).

I'm snagging this one for my page now,
This is fine, just so long as I know. Glad you like it that much!
Are we back to hos over bros?lissa_bear on February 14th, 2006 04:28 pm (UTC)
Beautiful! I'll come back and leave a better comment after work, but for now, I absolutely loved this!!!
mooyoomooyoo on February 14th, 2006 08:56 pm (UTC)
Lovely, as usual. Loved Lincoln wanting to leave so he doesn't have to face things, but wanting even more to find some way to tell Michael how proud he is and how much Michael means to him.

These tattoos are so unlike Michael that Lincoln’s breath catches every time he truly looks at them.

This is my favorite bit, I've been thinking about the same thing - how shocking it must be for Linc every time he sees this thing covering Michael that will never go away, how it goes so against Michael's personality and it further demonstrates just how much of himself Michael sacrificed for his brother. I had something similar in me head, of Michael catching Linc staring at him and when called on it Linc says something about how he can't get used to the tattoo, but haven't figured out an actual story to work it into yet :P
mooyoomooyoo on February 14th, 2006 08:59 pm (UTC)
LOVE love love your new layout, by the way :)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 11:28 pm (UTC) (Expand)
dawnstarrising: Lincolndawnstarrising on February 14th, 2006 10:14 pm (UTC)
This harshest of Michael’s outer scars hurts Lincoln more than anything.

I can imagine Lincoln finding that hard to accept.

Beautifully written as usual. You're one of my favourite authors.

*bighug*

Thank you!

D
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Lincoln by always2nlhalfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 11:30 pm (UTC)
Beautifully written as usual. You're one of my favourite authors. *bighug*

Thank you :-D That is some of the best feedback a write can get!
wentworth801 on February 14th, 2006 11:33 pm (UTC)
He turns his face away then, back to a moment when his little brother’s hand inside his own flowed into the tint of freckles instead of ink. But Lincoln knows that even after he moved out Michael was still hanging onto him, still pulled by the invisible threads of devotion. That hand never left his, not really, and this situation—snaking through the country as scarred and endangered fugitives-- is where Lincoln led them both.
Loved this. I liked how you wrote this strictly from Lincoln point of view. Michael might not see his sacrifices in the same way that Lincoln will forever see them. What the heck? I loved every bit of it.

Happy Valentine's Day!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on February 14th, 2006 11:41 pm (UTC)
I liked how you wrote this strictly from Lincoln point of view. Michael might not see his sacrifices in the same way that Lincoln will forever see them.
I agree- I think that when it comes to his intellect, Michael can be arrogant. But when it comes to his feelings-- and what they drive him to do-- he's rather modest. He believes in the worthiness of his brain, but I don't think he believes in the worthiness of himself.

Glad you liked this one! Happy Valentine's Day to you too :D
jeyhawkjeyhawk on February 15th, 2006 03:14 am (UTC)
Ooooh what a lovely fic. :0) All those sacrifices Michael had to make, all those feelings he hide. It's just lovely to see it from Lincoln's perspective.

Nice little glimpse into their post escape life. :0) Thanks for sharing.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Lincoln by always2nlhalfshellvenus on February 15th, 2006 04:56 am (UTC)
You're welcome :)

Many of Michael's sacrifices had terrible, lasting results. And there was so much potential for him to be killed inside prison, or to be attacked (beyond the toes).

The risks he took were even greater than the evidence left on his body.
Diellepseudoartiste on February 15th, 2006 04:47 am (UTC)
Wow Wow Wow! You amaze me with everything you write. I love how natural Linc's POV seems, and that acknowledgment of Michael's tremendous sacrifice is being made, it always seems to be lost in the complicated storylines and delicious T-Bag evil of fics. Realistically, he gave up his whole life for his bro *sniffles* that is so sweet. :)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Lincoln by always2nlhalfshellvenus on February 15th, 2006 05:00 am (UTC)
and that acknowledgment of Michael's tremendous sacrifice is being made, it always seems to be lost in the complicated storylines

It's true. We see the horror of the toes, and some of the threats by T-Bag and others. But there's no cumlative pointing out of how marked he'll be by this whole experience-- inside as well as outside-- and how great the risks are beyond just the plan not working.

Realistically, he gave up his whole life for his bro *sniffles* that is so sweet. :)
He did-- knowing that neither of them might make it out.

Makes the story so compelling! And so worth writing...

Thank you for your lovely comments, as always :)
Are we back to hos over bros?lissa_bear on February 15th, 2006 07:25 pm (UTC)
Ok, I'm back! Why did I love this, you ask? Let me tell you:

Michael and Lincoln in a tent makes me giddy, not sure why.

He feels the briefest cowardly urge to run away from it all, to escape the evidence of his own sins staring back at him from Michael’s mutilated body

I freakin' love, love, love this line! Because no one really pays much attention to the fact that Michael's sacrifice is A LOT to live up to. I'm sure Lincoln is majorly overwhelmed, not to mention guilt ridden.
And even if Lincoln reforms, Micheael will serve as a constant reminder of his former life.

that Michael is worth that, and always was even when Lincoln failed
This line breaks my heart.

Just the entire concept of this piece, so beautiful!

Lovely work, as always!

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Lincoln by always2nlhalfshellvenus on February 15th, 2006 08:17 pm (UTC)
Because no one really pays much attention to the fact that Michael's sacrifice is A LOT to live up to. I'm sure Lincoln is majorly overwhelmed, not to mention guilt ridden.
And even if Lincoln reforms, Micheael will serve as a constant reminder of his former life.

That line you quoted pretty much sums up the tone of the entire fic. SO much to live up to, and an inescapable reminder of how much Lincoln's former life cost them both.

that Michael is worth that, and always was even when Lincoln failed.
This line breaks my heart.

And you know Michael must feel that somehow he wasn't worth enough for people not to leave him (whether by death or by choice).

Ahhh... glad you came back for more comments. Whee!
(no subject) - thelana on February 15th, 2006 09:09 pm (UTC) (Expand)
jamiepbfan on February 17th, 2006 10:33 pm (UTC)
Hey Karen, thanks for the poke! I enjoyed the emotions and thoughts that Linc is going through. Altho Linc and Mike in a tent would just be awesome to witness. I loved the sincerity of this piece. I love it!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on February 17th, 2006 11:57 pm (UTC)
Altho Linc and Mike in a tent would just be awesome to witness.
You're thinking of the slash potential, aren't you? That's what's on thelana's mind too :)

I loved the sincerity of this piece.
Thank you! Michael's sacrifices deserve nothing less.
Mike/Linc and a tent - jamiepbfan on February 18th, 2006 01:04 am (UTC) (Expand)
i'm chris, not dustin (bella): Michael O_Oaccrues on March 10th, 2006 12:53 pm (UTC)
This sacrifice will mark his brother forever, and Lincoln cannot look any more without feeling that he and prison – and the tattoos themselves-- have obliterated his brother’s innocence beyond repair.

*whimper* You write so well! This is really really good. I think I'll just stick with this chapter though... no slash for me ;)

Michael sleeps on, and Lincoln’s gaze drifts down those legs to the last unspeakable injury, barely visible in the semi-darkness. This is no trick of the shadows, this blur where flesh should be. That elegant foot, forever ruined by the brutal absence of those toes, is the starkest reminder of all that Michael has endured. It will hinder him with every step, and it will shame him into self-consciousness—this symbol of the betrayal of decency that should make him proud instead.


*more whimpers* I was talking to my friend online and she started to twitch too when I started to relate quotes :) well done!! Memorising..
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on March 10th, 2006 04:14 pm (UTC)
*whimper* You write so well! This is really really good. I think I'll just stick with this chapter though... no slash for me ;)
Thank you very much! I like the line you quoted.

My stories are marked with the bold so that the Gen people can stick to the Gen stuff, because I completely understand that everyone has differents feelings about that. On my LiveJournal Homepage, they are grouped in different categories for that reason too.

*more whimpers* I was talking to my friend online and she started to twitch too when I started to relate quotes :) well done!! Memorising...
Thank you -- that's a huge compliment. The toes and the tattoos, as symbols of sacrifice and devotion-- and lost innocence that will never be reclaimed-- are big for me. They will be continual reminders for Michael of the choices that he made...