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10 June 2008 @ 02:47 pm
I Can Haz Banner Now?  
Over at spn_25, we've had a second author complete a claims list! muses_circle joins poisontaster in finishing off a table of 25 prompts-- congratulations to both!

Here's where I throw myself on the mercy of my f-list: I'd love to have a banner or love-bar to send authors with completed claims for posting on their journals. Anyone got skills in that area who might be able to help out? *big pleading eyes*

In other news, I want to thank my f-list for being a low-wank zone. Most of the time, if there's wank I don't even hear about it until it's over or darn near close. I usually find out second-hand via something someone else has posted, and I tell you-- it's great. Saves all kinds of turmoil and agony over things that tend to blow over anyway. \o/

This weekend: the kids are with an aunt until Thursday morning, having a wonderful time. This is the first time in almost 11 years that my husband and I have had any real time alone together! We've gotten the occasional night here and there, and two nights once back in November (same aunt). It is SUCH a relief to be able to pick up and go places for hours at will, and to get through dinner without running through someone else's schedule. We've been watching movies, relaxing. We tried to buy a sofa, but couldn't get a color we liked (honestly, if you hate brown, beige and colors from the diarrhea spectrum and are trying to buy a green sofa, you might as well forget it).

We had a brief moment where we thought we were suddenly buying a new car yesterday (the fan died, and the cost to fix it plus recharging the A/C was $730. The car's 16 years old, 193K miles). But because we want a Prius, and the demand is huge, we'd have to go on a waiting list. Well, you can't live A/C-free in Sacramento in the summer. We're going to have to stick with the old car longer. BUT! If we had to flail all over that for a few days, better to have it happen when the kids are not around.

Now that we've finally gotten my husband fully migrated to Kaiser (after losing his job) and gotten all the preliminaries out of the way, he's probably going to have another ECT (electro-shock treatment) tomorrow. I so wish the medication alone were solving this, and I hope it will help to have a new psychiatrist evaluate him for whether his problem is just depression or bi-polarism where the "high" only goes to Normal (which affects which medications to use). The medicine alone isn't keeping his depression at bay, and he's held on really hard over the last month (he was due for treatment May 6, but his coverage was cancelled, so he's now gone 8 weeks overdue). But we both hate this, and we keep hoping this part of his treatment will end soon. It's a choice you only make if you're desperate. *sigh*

I'll talk about the various movies later this week, but I just KNOW you're all reading the Big Bang stuff right now and not paying any attention to anything else. Wish I'd gotten that Jensen/Jared ficlet done over the weekend before all this started! Close, but... not quite. :)


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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on June 10th, 2008 10:34 pm (UTC)
I hope the short term remedy isn't needed again because a long term remedy comes to light with the switchover.
Gosh, I sure hope so. The ECT treatments are just awful, and are why the disability continues-- he's had a lot of memory loss, and it'll continue so long as the treatments go on. We're told that once they finish, he will likely get almost all of his memory back in the following 6-12 months (!).

I have to keep reminding myself, though, that he was SO low when the treatments started that they really were necessary. He's much better now. He's still quite depressed, but he's not so withdrawn that he's completely flat the way he was before. Having his sense of humor return was the first sign that the treatments were working.

*sigh* It's a tough road-- it's SO much better when medication is the only treatment needed, but that may be one of the signs of it being bi-polarism and not simple depression. Depression is "easier" to fix than bi-polarism. (I keep thinking of your roommate, and hoping she's gone to see someone because she sounded very, very low-functioning).

Thanks so much for you prayers and good wishes. I really appreciate them!
sassy, classy, and a bit smart-assy: DomSexybadboy_fangirl on June 11th, 2008 04:57 pm (UTC)
I just wish there were more answers as to what causes this and how we can prevent it as opposed to just treating it. Not that I'm not grateful that it's treatable now, but that process is sometimes as painful as the actual problem.

My roomie is doing much better. I think just facing that she has had a relapse is good. She is seeing a doctor now, and I'm very thankful for that. She's been much better and we even went out to dinner and a movie a couple weeks ago, and we're planning on going out this Saturday night. So it's getting better. More than anything, I just wanted to be able to address it and now we are. Acknowledging the problem is half the battle.

Is your husband's memory loss mostly short term? Or is it bigger stuff ? Like things you have to do for him since he doesn't remember how to do them? That would be very aggravating for both of you.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on June 11th, 2008 07:56 pm (UTC)
I just wish there were more answers as to what causes this and how we can prevent it as opposed to just treating it.
The depression and bipolarism are mostly chemistry-- usually relatives have it as well. The problem is, chemistry (and reactions to chemistry) vary slightly from person to person, as well as changing over time with age. Bi-polarism is simply hard (not a huge variety of medications, as compared to depression). But neither is as difficult as schizophrenia, which is mainly a miswired brain. All you can do there is treat the symptoms with medication as best you can-- you can't redevelop the brain appropriately. I'm just glad we have medication as an option, because for the longest time there was very little that could be done.

Acknowledging the problem is half the battle.
I think mainly for her-- she has to realize that she's changed and that it's worse than ever before there's any hope that she'll see that something very seriously needs to be done about it. The losing of perspective over time that comes with chronic or recurrent depression really makes that hard. It's like explaining to someone what it means to ask a person born with pain whether they hurt. How can they know? Their baseline has always had pain. With depression, once it's gone on too long you tend to forget that it was ever really different and then you have very much the same problem.

Is your husband's memory loss mostly short term?
It's mostly short-term, but for the first few days includes massive disorientation (as in, where are the kid's schools?) and occasionally kicks off things like not remembering where to put things away (so they get lost for awhile). But it has also eroded into the past (as in, the technical knowledge for my husband's profession is gone for the moment, or he doesn't remember anything that happened after about last May or so, or other random memory holes).

We lose a lot of continuity-- anything he'd been thinking about long-term gets wiped out when he has a treatment.