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20 February 2008 @ 10:53 am
Supernatural Gen Fiction: Snowzilla (PG-13)  
Title: Snowzilla
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Sam and Dean (Gen, Humor, Dialogue-fic)
Rating: PG-13 (language)
Summary: Number #137 on the list of things Dean wants to do before his year is over…
Author's Notes: A birthday present for winterlive, who is probably about as sick of snow by now as Sam. Many happy returns!

x-x-x-x-x

"Dean, why the hell are you stopping here?"

"I thought we'd build a snowman."

"Seriously? No. And what the fuck? We haven't done that since we were kids."

"Exactly. This could be one of the last chances I'll ever get..."

"God, why do you have to keep putting it that way? It's depressing."

"But it usually works. C'mon, Sam— I've been saving these Cheetos for the nose."

"Now that's just wrong."

"You sound like you're eighty! It's a new century, Sammy— time to move ahead with the rest of us."

"What makes you so sure those Cheetos are even from this century? How would we actually know?"

"Really don't think the snowman's going to care, Sammy. Now, you coming or what?"

"Jesus. All right…"

"That's the spirit. C'mon— there's a pine tree or something over there. That'll be good for supplies."

"You make it sound like recon, Dean."

"Might as well do the job right."

"And now you sound like Dad…"

*

"Okay, you didn't say we were building The Colossus here, Dean. Stop rolling— we still have to get the other two parts on top."

"I want people to see it from the highway. I want them to feel fear, Sam, do you understand?"

"Then you shouldn't have picked junk food for one of the basic materials. And I just want to feel my hands again."

"Wimp."

"Keep it up, and you'll be lifting the middle part by yourself."

"…"

*

"I like these branches for the arms, Sammy— the pine needles make it better, like he's got monster claws."

"It does look pretty good, I have to admit. What're we using for the mouth?"

"Broken-up twigs, like scraggly teeth. Like Snowzilla."

"Okay. Better make them big, then."

"The pinecones for the eyes look kind of freaky, though, Sam. Like a pair of armadillos running across his face."

"Maybe they're just after the Cheetos."

"Ha-ha."

"Nobody'll see the ridges on 'em from the road, Dean. It's too far away."

"Yeah, I suppose."

"So, are we about done? His face is on."

"Maybe. No, wait— something else. Psycho hair!"

"Gotta admit, Dean, I didn't think this was where you were headed with this whole nostalgia trip."

"Well, you know. It kinda detoured. But this is way better than what I'd first been thinking of anyway."

"Epic hair, dude— never knew clumps of twigs could look so bizarre."

"Good, huh Sammy?"

"Very good. So, is that it?"

"Let's back up and get the view from a distance… What do you think?"

"Totally awesome, man. Who knew?"

"I think it needs a victim…"

"Dean."

"Oh, all right. We can go now. I'll even crank up the heater in the car for you."

"Thank god. And Dean?"

"Sammy."

"You're welcome."


-------- fin --------


 
 
 
ErinRua: winter lakeerinrua on February 20th, 2008 08:06 am (UTC)
*flails like a mad flaily thing*

Oh my dog, this is awesome! This is hilarious! And it's all dialogue, not a scrap of narrative - you is brilliant, I tell you, brilliant!

LOL, and now I feel like my nose is cold and my feet are wet and my hands are numb, but gosh, there's an awesome snowman by the roadside. Hee! Me likes. Thanks for sharing!
Cheers ~

Erin
P.S.
Saving to mems, because this is too perfectly Sam-n-Dean not to save. :-)

Edited at 2008-02-20 08:09 am (UTC)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 08:14 am (UTC)
I started working this up on Thursday, and it was just dialogue then. And when it came time to think about fleshing out the rest of it, anything that wasn't dialogue would have been extraneous. Hence, this result (which I hope Danny doesn't totally hate).

but gosh, there's an awesome snowman by the roadside.
One which people will drive past, and then, "Wait-- WTF? What the heck is that?" And slow down for the detailed view, in all its Charles Manson glory. :0

You memmed it! *is dead of the happy* :) Whoo!
The Grammarian about whom your mother warned you.acostilow on February 20th, 2008 01:33 pm (UTC)
Hee. *hearts Dean and Sam and you*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 06:51 pm (UTC)
:D Thank you! Bet you're sick of the snow yourself, by now. :)
iamstealthyoneiamstealthyone on February 20th, 2008 01:40 pm (UTC)
This is so cute! The dialogue-only style works perfectly here. I still got all sorts of fun visuals. *g* And I totally enjoyed Sam starting out uber pissy but softening toward the end, and how Dean’s snowman evolves into something more menacing. *g*

Favorite lines:

"God, why do you have to keep putting it that way? It's depressing."

"But it usually works.


*g*

"I want people to see it from the highway. I want them to feel fear, Sammy, do you understand?"

LOL! Dean’s just too adorable in this piece.

Like a pair of armadillos running across his face."

"Maybe they're just after the Cheetos."


LOL!

"Thank god. And Dean?"

"Sammy."

"You're welcome."


Aww. *squishes them*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 07:21 pm (UTC)
And I totally enjoyed Sam starting out uber pissy but softening toward the end, and how Dean’s snowman evolves into something more menacing. *g*
It's hard not to get caught up in Dean's projects when he's being all dorky and enthusiastic-- Sam would have to have a heart of stone! And somehow that last part seems so Dean-- it starts off basic enough, but then the possibilities present themself and before you know it, epic weirdness!

Glad you liked this piece. It was sure fun to write. :D
cindy: spn - shoulder nudge (by carmendove)tsuki_no_bara on February 20th, 2008 03:03 pm (UTC)
dean would build a scary mutant snowman large enough to see from the road. hee. i love how sam assists under the guise of bitching.

"And Dean?"
"Sammy."
"You're welcome."


awww, boys. *smish*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 07:24 pm (UTC)
love how sam assists under the guise of bitching.
Eventually he comes around, though as we've seen time and again his first reaction is to reject any of Dean's more dorkish (in Sam's mind) enthusiasms. Sam gets Very Serious at times, and it takes awhile to coax him out of that mood. ;)

awww, boys. *smish*
:D Because you know Dean would totally neglect to actually thank Sam for doing that, even though it clearly was important to him. ;)
(Deleted comment)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 07:26 pm (UTC)
Re: why am i getting this flashback to calvin and hobbes...
There are parts of Dean that really remind me of Calvin at his worst. Left to a normal childhood, I'm convinced that Dean would have been the kind of kid who blew things up in the backyard. Except that Dean would worried about disappointing his parents afterward and tried to hide it, whereas Calvin would just bitch from the time-out corner. ;)

thanks for making me smile about the SNOW projected....to land here soon....
Boy, the three years I lived in the Midwest... I was so glad to move out of there and away from 5.5 months of snow and 5.5 months of heat/humidity. Gah!
tabaqui: s&dtonguebygreenapricottabaqui on February 20th, 2008 04:37 pm (UTC)
Heeeeee!
Calvin and Hobbs snowman!
I luff.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 07:27 pm (UTC)
The victim that Sam didn't let Dean make would be totally Calvin and Hobbes! Actually, Calvin would make a metric ton of victims. ;)

That icon is utterly perfect for this story, and it never fails to make me grin. :D
(no subject) - tabaqui on February 20th, 2008 08:06 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 08:39 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - tabaqui on February 20th, 2008 09:09 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 09:20 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - tabaqui on February 20th, 2008 09:31 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Nebula: spn hell house 'laughter'authoressnebula on February 20th, 2008 07:06 pm (UTC)
Dude.

I want them to feel fear, Sammy, do you understand?

*flails and falls off chair laughing*

Oh Dean, you're simply adorkable.

Saving this to my mems; I loved this little piece!

~Nebula
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 07:29 pm (UTC)
Oh Dean, you're simply adorkable.

At times like this, he so totally is! And I can't get over his enthusiasm for his walkman-turned-EMF-detector that Sam made fun of. Oh, that was mean! :0

Glad you liked this enough to Mem it. Whoo-hoo! ♥
vesuvianite on February 20th, 2008 08:53 pm (UTC)
That was very, very cute. And it's nice to get a touch of light-hearted silliness in this fandom, once in a while. =)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 09:01 pm (UTC)
And it's nice to get a touch of light-hearted silliness in this fandom, once in a while. =)
The more angsty the canon gets, the more I feel like I need these intermittent breaks.

S3 is even more angst-filled than S2!
(no subject) - vesuvianite on February 20th, 2008 09:36 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 09:39 pm (UTC) (Expand)
kelioskelios on February 20th, 2008 10:09 pm (UTC)
Only Dean would want the snowman of doom lol...Great story.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 10:11 pm (UTC)
Only Dean would want the snowman of doom lol...
Imagine how it would look when it's partly in the shadows. Mwah-ha-ha-ha! :D
(Deleted comment)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 10:31 pm (UTC)
:D Thank you!

I can just imagine how people driving by are going to react to that snowman. ;) Let's hope they manage to stay on the road. :0
danegen: lipsdanegen on February 20th, 2008 10:20 pm (UTC)
Adorable! So in the sequel, will Snowzilla come to life and mangle people with his pine tree claws?
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 20th, 2008 10:35 pm (UTC)
So in the sequel, will Snowzilla come to life and mangle people with his pine tree claws?
Some Supernatural being will find him and animate him, and he'll terrorize the highway, stomping from the Midwest to the Eastern Seaboard leaving a snarl of victims in his wake. :0

Or, not. ;) Hee!
the sundance kid: FTW!mresundance on February 20th, 2008 11:45 pm (UTC)
"I want people to see it from the highway. I want them to feel fear, Sammy, do you understand?"

HA!

I laughed out loud at that. I could totally hear Dean saying that.

This was sweet, and funny, and nicely done. Epic, even. *nods*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 21st, 2008 12:46 am (UTC)
I laughed out loud at that. I could totally hear Dean saying that.
It all starts out as something innocent, like building a snowman, and before long Dean has put his unique spin on things. To the horror of everyone else. ;)

and nicely done. Epic, even.
Haha! Nice use of the word "epic." Sam and Dean would approve. ;)
brigid_tanner: brothers-up to no goodbrigid_tanner on February 21st, 2008 12:07 am (UTC)
LOL!! I can totally see this snowzilla from their conversations. Great job, could hear the boys as I read, especially Sam's whiney voice :)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 21st, 2008 12:48 am (UTC)
:D Well, poor Sam, you have to see it from his POV. He's minding his own business out in the middle of snow-covered nowhere, and suddenly Dean gets this wild hair to do what now? In the cold? Like they're five again or something?

But eventually, he comes around.

You've got to think that Dean's had a lot of "wild hair" moments in all their years together. ;)
danny: nf: \o/winterlive on February 21st, 2008 12:09 am (UTC)
FEAR THE SNOMAN.

*monster arms*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 21st, 2008 12:51 am (UTC)
FEAR THE SNOMAN.

Or it will drag you down under and make you part of its snow-laden world. :0

Happy Birthday, Danny! Sorry you had to spend it in the Frozen North, but hey-- that's where all your family and friends are anyway. Plus, it coincides nicely with half-off Valentine's Day candy. ;)
Entendre? Make mine a double.: SN brothersdeirdre_c on February 21st, 2008 01:15 am (UTC)
Heeheeeeheehee! So, so fun! ♥
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on February 21st, 2008 01:45 am (UTC)
Ph3ar Dean's creation-- it cannot be tamed!

:D Glad you liked this, Dei!