August 29th, 2013


LJ Idol Exhibit B: "People Skills"

People Skills
LJ Idol Exhibit B | week fourteen | 1890 words
Not a f*cking people person (This is an intersection with the amazing lrig_rorrim, whose entry is here. Mine should be read first).


Zlork hated Mondays.

Even though his own planet's equivalent came around every six days instead of seven, Earth Mondays were worse. First, Zlork had to stuff himself into the subway (All Ybblex citizens are ambassadors of our planet, and must set a good example). No matter how tightly he wrapped his tentacles around himself, someone invariably stepped on them. Then, once he arrived at the Office Of Human/Alien Relations, he had to wedge himself into the too-small chair inside his dreadful cubicle (All Humalia employees are required to use approved, standard office furniture) and begin doing battle with the onslaught of paperwork, procedures, and his utterly aggravating coworkers.

The woman at the next desk made him want to devour his entire workstation. She talked endlessly, all day long, about nothing. He soon learned that keeping an eyestalk pointed her way and randomly bobbing it from time to time was better than enduring regular interruptions of, "Zlork. Zlork, are you listening? Hellooo? So anyway, what I was saying was…"

Today, his desk's holo-vid unit started up as soon as he sat down:

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Well, the voting for this round is not at all what I expected, and nobody's happy about it. If you enjoyed this entry, you can vote for it along with other offerings here. Pay attention, though—this round has an ugly twist. :(



Thanks to those of you who voted for me last week, I broke my LJ Idol "Top Ten" losing streak. Luckily, the round's two frontrunners also stayed in, surviving a late voting surge. It's always tough this late in the competition—all the writers are good, and the eliminations are miserable.

So, for this week's entries the remaining eight writers paired up to work together. lrig_rorrim and I had all kinds of fun collaborating on our stories. But now for the ugly twist: in thinking we were doing an "intersection," we each inadvertantly picked our competitor for this round. NOBODY is happy about this, especially as most of us were working with good friends whose work we love. Ugh. I've been consoling myself with chocolate ever since the voting announcement came out.

Better news: my bike is behaving itself again, since what it mostly needed was major tightening of the derailleurs after new cables were put on (they stretch a lot at first). I was able to bike yesterday without trying to avoid any iffy gears. I still have to eventually replace my shoes, but I am not above using duct tape (albeit in decorative fashion) to temporarily suit my needs.

HalfshellHusband and I finished watching S3 of the BBC's Luther. Episode three was heartbreaking (I'm still unhappy about it), and this season's "love interest" didn't really work. Still, so much fantastic acting, and the storytelling is gripping. Definitely more satisfying than the trainwreck that is S7 of Burn Notice. Honestly I can't fathom who thought fans would enjoy any part of the S7 storyline. It's been almost pure aggravation.

Books: I finished Imaginary Enemy (a good YA novel), I started Let's Explore Diabetes With Owls, and I'm trying to resist re-reading The Hot Zone (which is in the house, so I may lose that battle). New Jack Reacher novel at the gym, and I'm still working on the book of short stories by the bed. But I picked up a few more grown-up books at the library, so a changeover may happen soon.

Weekend plans? I'll be doing home projects, and possibly getting seduced by hardware store ads...