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08 December 2007 @ 10:52 am
Supernatural Slash Drabble Set: All The Answers Inside You  
Title: All The Answers Inside You
Author: HalfshellVenus
Pairing: Sam/Dean (Wincest)
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Searching for answers and finding something more.
Warnings: Post-Season 2, contains S2 spoilers.
Author's Notes: These are four connected drabbles on elemental themes—a set I've wanted to do for some time. For my spn_25 table, this is "Innocence."

~*~*~*~


Sun
Yesterday was another dead end. The Savannah sorcerer who dabbled in black magic said the same thing they'd heard before: a bargaining for the soul could not be revoked.

Dean never expected anything else—he'd gone into that deal knowing the ultimate price. He didn't regret it, no matter what.

But here, with the sunlight turning the leaves to gold, bringing touches of red into Sam's hair and echoing Sam's smile, Dean hopes there might still be a chance.

With all that he ever wanted sitting right here—innocent and beautiful— it's going to be so damned hard to leave.


Moon
Sam should be sleeping, but every night gets harder. Six months gone and still no answers… Dean's year is running out.

The nightmares are no longer about Jess now. Instead, Sam loses Dean in ever-changing pieces of heartbreak—swallowed below earth, pulled under water, burned, beaten, or just slipping away into death while Sam's back is turned.

In the blue haze of moonlight, Dean's sleeping face is far more peaceful than Sam's heart. You did all this for me.

The loneliness of Dean's love whispers from the shadows.

Sam would do anything to show him he feels the same way.


Sea
There is a feeling of eternity at the edge of the ocean. The horizon expands without end, ceaseless waves rolling in the patterns of millennia.

Sam sees the ocean with the eyes of a child. Memories of digging and building and splashing sift past like silken sand. He was happy here so many times—lost in the games of any other boy. He and Dean laughed and ran, and it all seems so long ago now.

Beside him, Dean is the silent weight of the present. Sam's kiss surprises him—Dean shivers, his eyes filling with wonder.

Yes.

Me too
.


Stars
It is a week, no more, since everything changed. A single kiss—impossible, wrong, but so perfect that it stole Dean's every thought—opened the last barrier that stood between him and Sam.

The passion Dean had carried for so long found its answer in Sam's lips, in Sam's body and soul.

This is what was missing. Dean holds Sam close, under the glow of the midnight sky.

He can't remember feeling this happy—not even with Cassie before things went bad. He strokes Sam's face, unable to stop or look away.

All the stars are shining in Sam's eyes…



-------- fin --------


 
 
 
Catherine Winnersunrunnersioned on December 8th, 2007 07:09 pm (UTC)
stunning work as always...this fic was just heartbreakingly beautiful!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 8th, 2007 07:20 pm (UTC)
Thank you! It was intended for Hell Quarterly's drabble issue, so I put in extra effort. Just now getting to post it up.

Those four combined themes have been on my "todo" list for about a year and a half, and I'm so glad something finally came of them. :)
I'm Mulder, She's Scully: Chicagorunedgirl on December 8th, 2007 07:19 pm (UTC)
Yes. Me too.

Just three words, but they speak so much for these two who speak so little. Beautiful imagery in this, love the contrast of the ocean evoking eternity with the stark reality of limited time running out for the boys.

Thanks,
Lynsey
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 8th, 2007 07:22 pm (UTC)
Just three words, but they speak so much for these two who speak so little.
Oh, and so often what they say is the wrong thing when it comes to each other.

love the contrast of the ocean evoking eternity with the stark reality of limited time running out for the boys.
I love that you noticed that! ♥
(no subject) - aeroport_art on December 8th, 2007 09:48 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - halfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:46 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Gray is my favorite coloraynslee on December 8th, 2007 08:57 pm (UTC)
The imagery here was breathtaking! Beautiful.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:46 pm (UTC)
Thank you, Aynslee! I really enjoyed writing to the imagery from the prompts as well as to the emotions and the angst here. :)
Montmorency: Sam&Deanmontmorency on December 8th, 2007 09:26 pm (UTC)
Oh so sweet and lovely. I could hear the ocean and feel the moonlight.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:47 pm (UTC)
Ooh, I love this kind of feedback. Thank you! :)
 { ~ 夢踊り~ } ..... dance through my dreams: hard_to_fallyume_odori on December 8th, 2007 09:40 pm (UTC)
that hurts, but it's so beautiful.


Yes.

Me too.


ouch.


thank you for sharing this with us!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:48 pm (UTC)
ouch.

It's like you can feel those silent words falling into a void of years and thinking, "This all could have happened sooner." I ache with happiness for them that they got to that point, and also with pain for all the lost time finding it.
aeroport_art: biteaeroport_art on December 8th, 2007 09:46 pm (UTC)
Oooh, these are some of your most lovely vignettes.

The loneliness of Dean's love
It IS! Dean's manner of loving Sam is the loneliest, most despondent and beautiful, fucked-up thing ever. And that's why we can't stop exploring, interpreting, and writing about it, because it's just so complex and sad.

There is a feeling of eternity at the edge of the ocean.
I don't know how you manage to articulate old truisms in fresh ways, over and over again. Don't you run out of words?? I feel like I'm always trying to describe the ocean--how meaningful it is as a metaphor and/or physical entity, but I can never get it out right. This is it done right.

The only thing possible nitpick I'd have is, I'm not a big fan of ending stories with ellipsis. That's not a critique though, just a personal preference! Otherwise, I've already pointed out which parts I love. Huzzah!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:52 pm (UTC)
It IS! Dean's manner of loving Sam is the loneliest, most despondent and beautiful, fucked-up thing ever.
It really is-- I don't think I've ever said it so concisely, but in abstract that is EXACTLY what is so angsty and compelling about it. I just can't leave it alone.

Don't you run out of words??
Sometimes, and maybe this won't make sense, I let the other side of the brain do some of the writing-- the abstract side that's only half-conscious of what it's doing. Half the time you get a subliminal effect from it (meaning that hits home underneath the words in a way that is sensed rather than explainable), and the other time you get something that is like this.

That's not a critique though, just a personal preference!
:) I don't do it that often, but here it leaves a feeling of lingering over that moment along with Dean. And I kind of like that effect.

Glad you liked these-- I've been waiting on them forever, because they were for a Hell Quarterly drabble issue (September) that didn't get published.
ruby_jellyruby_jelly on December 8th, 2007 10:15 pm (UTC)
wow! I am left wanting more, (of the boys together I guess) but clearly your story doesn't need that. Evocative, moody. Heart-breaking.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:54 pm (UTC)
Thank you, Ruby. It really IS moody-- and more of what I'd hoped to see in S3 (since it was written before that). I want to see more of the pain of love between the boys and less of the running around. And I really, really want more moments of connection instead of all the ways that Sam worries about Dean and Dean throws him off.

I want them to meet in the middle, even in a Gen sense. This is the more romantic version of all that, where Dean finally finds the love he's wanted but never thought he deserved from anyone all these years.
(Deleted comment)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:55 pm (UTC)
Thank you very much! With as many drabbles as I write, you'd think more of them would be slash, but they're actually quite rare. And I really like the sets, like this one. :)
motherlycluckermotherlyclucker on December 9th, 2007 12:40 am (UTC)
Oh wow. The emotion in this was breathtaking. LOVED IT!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:56 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! This was all about the emotion-- all the ache and fear of what will happen S2, and the pain of time running out both on Dean's chances and the possibility of their love. *wibble*
dc_longwing on December 9th, 2007 02:35 am (UTC)
OH, man. So, so beautiful. Each one shines by itself, put there's an arc there, too.
Sigh. Just lovely.
Thanks so much,
DC
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:57 pm (UTC)
Thank you, DC! I've been wanting to write this set of exact four prompts for so long, and this finally gave me the opportunity. The basic possibilities are very rich, but in an arc they are more powerful still.

Especially this almost-never-found love that is the crux of all I want for these two boys.
brigid_tanner: brothers-on fence at lakebrigid_tanner on December 9th, 2007 03:01 am (UTC)
Beautiful. Love the tie-in to the elements.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 08:58 pm (UTC)
Thank you, Brigid! The set of these four elements has been on my "to-write" list for over a year now-- I've just been waiting for somethign that would use all four of them in an arc. The ending to S2 finally gave me that. :)
redheadforeverredheadforever on December 9th, 2007 08:14 am (UTC)
Such beautiful drabbles.

Dean's boundless love brought Sammy back and traded his own eternity. Sam finally realizes how much this good man means to him halfway through that last year, in time to do something about it even if he can't ultimately reverse what's to happen.

Love, more than Dean ever dreamed of having, for another half a year.

*throws roses and chocolate at the author*

Red

Happy Deanwoman
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 09:00 pm (UTC)
in time to do something about it even if he can't ultimately reverse what's to happen.
That's the most wonderful thing-- even if he can't buy more time for Dean, he can finally give him something in the time left that Dean's never had. And it's the thing Dean needs most of all. *happy sigh*

*throws roses and chocolate at the author*
*gratefully accepts them, with much love!*
(Deleted comment)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 09:01 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! They were intended for the Hell Quarterly drabble issue (before that got dropped), and they really needed to be something extra.

That lingering angst from the S2 finale provided a wonderful opportunity, once I got over being just devastated by it. Though I still want Sam to find a way out for Dean...
I'm for wine and the embrace of questionable womenmissyjack on December 9th, 2007 11:09 pm (UTC)
Beautiful writing, which also packs an emotional punch with lines like:
The loneliness of Dean's love whispers from the shadows.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 9th, 2007 11:54 pm (UTC)
The loneliness of Dean's love whispers from the shadows.
That single aspect of Dean makes me ache for him, under all the assiness he throws out as misdirection.

Even in a Gen sense, it's sad to think how important his family was to him and what he gave up to try to please them... and how little they knew him at all. Not that he made it easy for them, trying to be everything his father wanted instead of himself, and trying to keep from ever appearing vulnerable to Sam. But still...
tyricaltyrical on December 11th, 2007 12:45 am (UTC)
This right here is a little bit of awesome
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam/Dean kisshalfshellvenus on December 12th, 2007 11:24 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! I really worked on this one, because of its original purpose. But I'll never lose my love for drabble arcs in general, especially on finding the True Love that is waiting but always unseen.