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25 March 2007 @ 11:48 pm
Supernatural Gen Drabbles: Death by Repetition  
Title: Death by Repetition
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Sam and Dean (Gen, Humor)
Rating: PG
Summary: Ghost-hunting isn't all slime and glamor, not by a long shot…
Author's Notes: For the "Routine Maintenance" challenge at supernatural100.

x-x-x-x-x

Floss-zilla
Dean's outside the door again. "Sam, are you living in there now, or what?"

Sam spits into the sink and opens the door, giving Dean the full benefit of his froth-covered mouth. "I'm brushing my teeth, Dean. Is there a problem?"

"For the last half hour! Geez, be done with it already!"

"We don't have regular checkups, Dean. We can't be getting cavities that turn into root canals or crowns—God knows who we'd go to, some of the places we've been."

Dean crowds into the bathroom right as Sam reaches for the dental floss.

"Toothpaste."

"Told you..."

"Bite me."


Spinning
"Flip you for it."

"Let's both just go. It's not like anything's happening out here in the car, Dean."

They grab the duffle bags and jelly jar of change from the trunk.

"I hate these places."

"We all do, Dean. It's either this, or find an apartment. What do you say?"

"Not on your life."

They stake out their machines, Dean loading the washers while Sam buys detergent. Minutes later they're in plastic butt-buckets flipping through magazines.

"Sucker's gonna eat another sock, I can feel it."

"Lift the lid and do an exorcism, why don't you?"

"Ha-ha. Ooh—horoscopes."

Christ.


Miles of Aisles
"Get the blue kind."

"They're pretzels, Dean. What does it matter?"

"I always get the blue ones."

"Store brand is cheaper."

Paper towels, rubbing-alcohol, pickles—

"We don't need pickles. Put them back."

… first-aid tape and gauze, apples—

"A whole bag? C'mon, Dean, focus."

"Dude, I'm hungry! Stop grabbing the food away."

… a big container of drinking water…

"Matches. We need a bunch of booklets."

"And candles. A couple of lighters, too."

… duct tape, beef jerky, string, a candy bar…

"So we don't look psycho."

"Too late. Wait—get me one too."

"Bitch-bites or Wookie-cookie?"

"Dean..."

"Bitch-bites it is."


-------- fin -------


 
 
 
 Late Night Drops of Random: Dean and Sammoondropz on March 26th, 2007 07:31 am (UTC)
LMAO! oooh these amused me to no end! Because I can so see them doing this! Nicely done! ;-p
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 26th, 2007 09:00 pm (UTC)
Hahaha! Thank you! And oh, don't I love their snarky dialogue and the weirdness of their everyday lives. ;)
(no subject) - moondropz on March 26th, 2007 10:03 pm (UTC) (Expand)
jeyhawk: supernatural: deanjeyhawk on March 26th, 2007 08:40 am (UTC)
*snortles* I like how you managed to capture their voices. *grins*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 26th, 2007 09:02 pm (UTC)
You mean their "bitching", right? ;) I so love writing dialogue for these two. It's one of my favorite parts of the show.

There's a porn drabble right before this one... ;)
(no subject) - jeyhawk on March 26th, 2007 09:03 pm (UTC) (Expand)
jeddy83 on March 26th, 2007 08:53 am (UTC)
I really enjoyed these rather neat little slices of their life on the road.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 26th, 2007 09:02 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! I thought I'd really work the heck out of the prompt, because it all seemed to come back to this. And the wonderful "un-funness" of all these pesky little chores. ;)
Ah yes, quite a bunch of us, isn't it?unhobbityhobbit on March 26th, 2007 09:37 am (UTC)
I love the domesticity. They're human and need to do these things, it's just with a little demon-hunting twist, I really like that.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 26th, 2007 09:04 pm (UTC)
Thank you!

Oh, the shopping list was one of the most fun parts of it, just figuring out what kinds of things they'd need to buy without filling up the car too much. And darned if those supplies don't look kind of disturbing when you get right down to it.

Plus, laundromats are death. I remember this from college. :0
plutogirl10 on March 26th, 2007 09:54 am (UTC)
*happy sigh*

I so needed some humour after that last episode . . . these hit the spot, thanks for sharing doll :)

Also, I hear there's some PB congratualtions in order :D CONGRATULATIONS! You so deserve the award, honey. *Hugs*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 26th, 2007 10:14 pm (UTC)
I so needed some humour after that last episode . . . these hit the spot, thanks for sharing doll :)
Oh god, I think we all did. *angst-wibble sniffle-sniffle heartache*

Thank you for the PB congratulations! It honestly looked like even the Slash awards were going to go to M/S shippers there for awhile. (!) Relieved and grateful that they did not.

Plus, new banners. ;)
bluesister on March 26th, 2007 03:35 pm (UTC)
"Ha-ha. Ooh—horoscopes."
Love that!

And the last one is such a nice balance between the weaknesses and strengths of both brothers. In a sweet, fluffy way. :)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 26th, 2007 10:16 pm (UTC)
Love that!
With the Tabloid-hunting (like "Men in Black") and some of their other 'sources,' that had real comic possibility as something Dean might take seriously: As Mars rises mid-month, you will new challenges. The full moon brings change. Ulp!

And the last one is such a nice balance between the weaknesses and strengths of both brothers. In a sweet, fluffy way. :)
:D Sam's so much the anti-fun there, but then Dean's all spending money they don't have, so I think the compromise is probably all for the best. ;)
Butterflymgbutterfly on March 26th, 2007 03:59 pm (UTC)
OMG! Bitch-bites!

These were so damn funny. Started my Monday morning off right.

Bwahahahaha!!!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 26th, 2007 10:17 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much!

Monday victory is fantastic-- everyone could use a lift on Monday, including me. :D \o/
i_speak_tonguei_speak_tongue on March 26th, 2007 04:19 pm (UTC)
Brilliant. These were so perfectly contained and cute. THeir voices really ring clear and true. My favorite part had to be:

"Sucker's gonna eat another sock, I can feel it."

"Lift the lid and do an exorcism, why don't you?"

"Ha-ha. Ooh—horoscopes."

Christ.


Exorcising a washer... now thats a bizarre mental image! And I can so see Deans face! I wish this was canon, just so I could watch it over and over
.... speaking of repetition ;)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 27th, 2007 05:26 am (UTC)
:D Other people get socks eaten all the time, but only Sam and Dean would try to get each other worked up over it being some kind of Supernatural conspiracy. ;)

I'd seriously love to see any of these scenes in canon. Not just for the comic relief, but as a reminder of the Long Suffering ways of demon-hunters, and the mundanities they must still put up with while trying to rid the world of evil. Not so much like Clark Kent and his day job, but more like the Reapers on "Dead Like Me" who still have to pay the rent. Double-bummer for them.

So glad you liked these. :) I had a terrific time writing the dialogue, which is most of the stories here. :D
angels3angels3 on March 26th, 2007 04:47 pm (UTC)
OMG
This was hysterical especially the grocery store. My second job in life was the grocery store checkout and the things people bought would keep me entertained for hours especially when it was in an odd combination. Yep they would have been serial killers in training cause you just don't buy that stuff at the same time in the same place if you don't want to get caught. The Bitch-bites priceless and so very much a Deanism.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 27th, 2007 05:40 am (UTC)
Re: OMG
and the things people bought would keep me entertained for hours especially when it was in an odd combination.
I swear, when I buy weird things, I'm always wondering if the checkout person notices. Like, tampax and chocolate in the same purchase would seem to be screaming TMI right there. My sister got sent to the grocery store once while pregnant, to buy sauerkraut for my brother and ice cream for her husband. "These aren't for me," she kept telling everyone, but I doubt that they believed her. ;)

Yep they would have been serial killers in training cause you just don't buy that stuff at the same time in the same place if you don't want to get caught.
Duct tape, rope and matches in combination alone scream "up to something," don't they? But darned if they don't come in handy for those Demon-hunting types.

So glad you liked it-- and it clearly struck a chord because you know what it's like being on the other end. :D
cindy: spn - shoulder nudge (by carmendove)tsuki_no_bara on March 26th, 2007 05:13 pm (UTC)
shopping with dean must be a trial, and i mean that seriously. fun to read, tho. :D and he reads the horoscopes! heee!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 27th, 2007 05:42 am (UTC)
shopping with dean must be a trial, and i mean that seriously.
I actually imagine that it would be a whole lot like this, and I can see where that could try a person's patience after awhile! It'd be like shopping with a four-year-old who has grabby hands. :0

and he reads the horoscopes! heee!
That oddly seems very likely to me, even as I'm horrified by the thought! But considering what they do.... ;)

Thanks for reading!
not a morning person...tattoo_kink on March 26th, 2007 06:13 pm (UTC)
*lol*

Love the all - but the second is just priceless! *ggg*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 27th, 2007 05:50 am (UTC)
:D I think Laundromats would be their own kind of Special Hell for people who live like Sam and Dean do. I hate them, so much so that when we've gone to Europe I wash clothes in the hotel sink. :0

And I'm not going there every 2-4 weeks like these two. :D

Thanks so much, Stephie!
Laura Drusilla: Jensen - Squee!vampyric_lycan on March 26th, 2007 07:26 pm (UTC)
Hee! Marvellous little snippets -- it's great to see the guys just being guys.

"Ha-ha. Ooh - horoscopes." -->Priceless *giggles*
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 27th, 2007 05:54 am (UTC)
:D Thank you!

I have both a secret horror and fascination with the idea of Dean taking horoscopes seriously. :D
squishy is the new shiny!: brotherwrestlingteithiwr on March 26th, 2007 07:35 pm (UTC)
"Bitch-bites or Wookie-cookie?" OMG this is awesome. I love the brotherly banter in these - it feels so real. I love these little snippets of their life when they're doing stuff everyone does.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 27th, 2007 05:57 am (UTC)
Hee! I have such a great time writing dialogue for these two when they're being snarky, and if there were ever anything to bring out a bitchfest it would be something that resembles chores. Gah!

The laundromat thing alone would make me reconsider the lifestyle, if I were Dean. :D
(Deleted comment)
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 27th, 2007 06:02 am (UTC)
Thank you so much, Rinne!

Clearly I must like them too-- not just for the banter, but because there were three of them. I couldn't resist going nuts on the prompt for this week's challenge. :)
vesuvianite on March 27th, 2007 02:54 am (UTC)
I got a couple good chuckles out of this. Thanks. =)

plastic butt-buckets

Hee.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors: Sam & Dean Genhalfshellvenus on March 27th, 2007 06:03 am (UTC)
Thank you!

plastic butt-buckets
I'm wondering why no-one else noticed that line, because you just know what those are. I'm getting a visual right now-- they're usually orange. :0