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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
05 January 2022 @ 10:49 am


Prison Break Fanfiction
I write primarily non-shipper general fiction, and some Lincoln/Michael slash pieces as well. Yes, I know they’re brothers… and no, I normally wouldn’t be writing brothercest. That said, if it’s not your thing then please stick to the General Fiction section.

                  Prison Break Gen Fiction                      Prison Break Slash Fiction

Supernatural Fanfiction
Supernatural also deals with two brothers, who in this case are bound together in the pursuit of demons and vengeance. An excellent overview of this show and its characters can be found here.
                  Supernatural Gen Fiction                      Supernatural Slash Fiction

Other Fanfiction: Iron Man, Die Hard 4, Chuck, White Collar, Burn Notice, Reaper, and more

Original Fiction and Non-Fiction Stories: Miscellaneous Original Fiction // Real LJ Idol Season 8 // LJ Idol Exhibit A // LJ Idol Exhibit B // LJ Idol Season 9 // LJ Idol Friends And Rivals // LJ Idol Season 10

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
14 June 2019 @ 08:31 am
Up and down I-5 for the next couple of days, going to our daughter's graduation on Saturday and moving stuff to The Boy's new apartment before bringing him home.

And? After helping review and edit three papers between thet two of them and being up until 1:30-2:30 every night, I am now officially more tired than I ever was during my OWN Finals week! \o?

Don't break anything while I'm gone...

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
11 June 2019 @ 07:40 pm
I've been working on getting things done around the house and yard in the weekends between our anniversary trip and next weekend's college graduation/pickup run. Mainly, removing bulbs from the yard (while I can still tell where they are) and finally, finally tackling the mold problem in the master bedroom closet.

The bulb thing will take forever. I cleared out the garden area on one side of the driveway. That took about 8 hours total, broken up over three separate days. Now I'm working on the walkway. Tons. TONS of bulbs. Probably about 100-150 on each side, clustered in about 20-25 groups. /o\

The closet chore took two weekends, to do half of the closet at a time. That involved removing the contents from one side, cleaning mildewed clothes and purses/shoes/belts, deciding what to donate or store away in vacuum-seal bags, cleaning the hangers, and then scrubbing and wiping down the walls/ceiling/shelves/floor with a water-vinegar solution... Gah. So tedious.

I'm still not done, and I haven't put anything from the second half away yet. Instead, I was up late last night reviewing and editing our daughter's final essay for college. It was a bittersweet experience, full of pride for how well she writes and all the amazing work she's done over these last four years, and sadness that this part of her life is over, because I know how much she'll miss it. *sniffle*

On a different topic, I've been meaning to do a brain-dump for weeks of all things viewed and read. So, let me tackle the viewing part.

We've been catching up on this season's final episodes of The Blacklist. Let me just say that after 5 seasons and multiple appearances, it is WAY too late to make Brian Dennehy's character Russian. WHY would you even think of doing that? /o\ Overall, much of this season has had some truly painful (angst-painful, not WTF-painful) plot lines that have been stressful and emotionally hard to watch. And Liz's character has been annoying throughout, first dangerously obsessed with finding out the truth about Red, and then being all 'La-la-la-la' dippy as if none of the consequences of her actions were harmful. Also, there's the disappearing sister...

Blindspot has returned after a month-long hiatus. Apart from wanting to kill Jane most of the season, my thoughts about this show are that more Patterson and more Rich-dot-com are always welcome. :) Except for the Fourth-Wall-shattering thing involving Patterson's father. :O

I've been getting caught up on the latest season of Z Nation via Netflix (it became a victim of our Tivo meltdown over Christmas). I'm glad 10K's skeevy facial hair is gone, though I'm mystified over why Red still exists, plot-wise. Because *fan-service hand-waving* is not a legitimate reason.

I do like George, though. She's a strong and compassionate character, and I'm guessing the Hurt/Comfort femme-slash fanfiction must be off the charts for her and Lieutenant Warren. Unless I'm wrong and there's no interest in it, but I can't imagine that being the case? If your reaction to all this is, "Whoa, throw down the fossil flag, Halfshell—Hurt/Comfort slash? That is not even a thing anymore. What decade do you think this IS?", well... I don't want to know.

We finished S2 of the Netflix show Border Town. We refer to it as "Old Finns," because there is now another Netflix police drama set in Finland called Deadwind, which we call "New Finns." I really like the female lead on Deadwind.

As for the late-season network TV shows, we tried The Inbetween last week just to see if we liked it. We definitely did—both of us really wanted to binge-watch the whole series now, which sadly is not a choice. :O

We've also seen The Code, where Blindspot's Roman (Remy's brother) stars as a Marine Corps lawyer. He looks impossibly young without a beard—like, 25 or so—and I do think he was more attractive as woobie!Roman. But so far, we mostly like the show, and hope that it isn't destined to become just a "pretty people" vehicle. Also, we call it "The Cod." Somehow, the episode titled P.O.G. made that happen.

That's all for now. *whew*

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
07 June 2019 @ 10:46 am
Life did its best to undo the effects of our wonderful trip away Memorial Day Weekend. :O

After a long day back at work last Wednesday, I got a flat tire about three miles from home that turned into the Flat From Hell. It's always an annoying and filthy job changing a flat tire, and I only remember ever having two flats on the 4Runner over these past 23 years (!), so I'm not sure I've done the job entirely by myself on this car before.

It did not go well. :O After working on it in the evening heat, then calling HalfshellHusband for some better tools, then calling AAA for service (and being given a 4-5 hour wait time), the car wound up having to get towed to the tire store the next morning. The cable securing the spare under the car had to be cut because the padlock around it was frozen (even with oiling). The crank mechanism to lower the spare was no longer working either (regular maintenance a few days later revealed that everything was rusted out below and needed to be replaced). And the spare tire was actually garbage. It was ollld.

Finding all that out was actually a relief. I hadn't felt that incompetent in a long time—it was just a flat tire, for crying out loud! Though the last time I tried to fix a flat on the Prius, that didn't go well either. The jack tools that came with the car are lousy—it's nearly impossible to raise the car for a front flat, as it's super-heavy and the jack lever puts all the work in your wrists instead of your arms. HSH even struggled with it, and the next flat we got, he came to my aid in the 4Runner with its better tool set.

By contrast, the jack and tools for my '84 Tercel were a thing of efficient, ergonomic beauty. WTF, Toyota? How do you forget something you used to do so well?

Part two of "All Things Dead" was the discovery on Wednesday that our A/C is broken again. We had a sudden heat surge after a long, weird spring, and I finally turned the A/C on Tuesday night at bedtime (it was 79o in the house). At 3:30 a.m., I shut it off because it was still running and shouldn't have been. When I turned it back on late Wednesday afternoon, we noticed the outside unit (that does the actual cooling) was not coming on. YAYyyy. I rechecked the thermostat setup and HSH checked the circuit breakers, but no. It got up to 81o in the house before the evening temps finally started to drop around 9 p.m.

We called the service guy, but of course, a heat surge is when everyone ELSE discovers their A/C is broken. He referred us to a friend, whose soonest appointment was Tuesday. So, back to our guy, who is coming tomorrow.

Meanwhile, we have a few days of wind and lower temperatures, which will help. As long as the evening breezes and cooling happen, you can open up the house and super-cool it overnight. It's usually when those stop that the daytime temperatures get REALLY high, which makes the house heat up and causes you to need that nighttime cooling even more.

I expect that's what's ahead staring Sunday. Daytime highs of 95o to 102o are expected through next Thursday.

I hate this climate. I hate this climate.

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
04 June 2019 @ 12:49 am
We got back from our Memorial Day Weekend anniversary trip to the coast almost a week ago. It was really nice, and it had been a while. We used to go on romantic getaways at least a couple of times a year before we had kids, but it has been closer to once every 5-7 years since. :O

They're a great way to rejuvenate your relationship away from the distractions of, say, chores. And more chores. And open-ended home projects, and the office rut, and on top of all that? Chores. /o\

We went to Point Reyes, which is where we used to go for our anniversary back in the day. We got there early enough on Saturday to have a short, slow hike up the main trail and back. It rained on Sunday, so we explored the town of Pt. Reyes Station and drove around for a bit, then watched a movie in our room before dinner. Monday, I went for a solo hike (those trails were steeper than I remembered), and then we relaxed for a bit before going out to dinner at Vladimir's (a Czech restaurant, which we chose because how often does an opportunity like that present itself?) The lodgings were nice, and we made great use of the jacuzzi. It turned we were also right next door to a sporadically-used pasture, which we discovered Sunday morning when insistent mooing started up around 9 a.m. and went on for hours. We were both awake by then, but geez. Were those chronically dissatisfied animals, or was it a cow-poetry slam? :O

The restaurant menus were somewhat similar at all the nearby places, with leanings toward the kinds of things you would find via the Hipster Menu Generator. They're a reminder that you're in Marin County, and they straddle the line between snobby cuisine and the offerings of an incestuous group of chefs who are possibly more focused on out-weirding each other than on creating food that is uniquely delicious. Vladimir's made for a refreshing contrast. ;)

The place where we stayed was supposed to have a DVD player, and we brought a few movies toward that purpose. Instead, they had Netflix and trial episodes of various things on Amazon. Hey, we already surf those same choices at home and regularly find nothing to watch! Netflix was showing the RDJ/Jude Law Sherlock Holmes we'd brought, so we did watch that. We also saw Burnt (ironically appropriate for the restaurant experience we were having), and we tried a new Amazon series called Fearless that we've continued at home.

We had to check out of our lodgings late Tuesday morning, so after a stop at the Bovine Bakery for more scones and chocolate chip cookies, we headed back home and arrived in time for both of us to go out for a bicycle ride in some very nice weather. It was tough going back to work on Wednesday!

For those of you who had a long weekend, did you do anything fun? Or conversely, did you tackle something around the house that's been nagging at you and just needed some extended time to work on?

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
23 May 2019 @ 02:42 pm
I went biking today, and it felt completely normal--on par with rides from a month ago, before the Weekend of WTF when I was suddenly so exhausted. There's still some coughing, because I'm still trying to keep gunk out of my lungs, but the inhaler is really helping. Yesterday was pretty good too, performance-wise. The actual ride involved a lot of left turns, U-turns, and loops to avoid the worst of the wind, though the wind itself was manageable (if annoying). Better than Tuesday, when I didn't go out at all because I couldn't even open the outside door when I went to see how bad the wind was, which basically answered my question. Twice. \o?

We're heading to the coast this weekend to celebrate our anniversary, and really looking forward to that. We've had so few romantic bed-and-breakfast outings since having the kids, and this is one we used to do every Memorial Day weekend before that. I'd still like to take a trip to Europe, but that involves getting passports, which has been on my TODO list for well over a year now. :O

I booked hotels in Southern California for our trip in June, when we'll attend our daughter's college graduation and then collect our son for the summer. Finding hotels is SUCH a chore for both college locations. They're both in expensive neighborhoods, so you really can't stay terribly close by, and even so, rooms are just awfully expensive. I've found some places to avoid on return trips, but no "Remember this one, it's good!" locations thus far.

HalfshellHusband is concerned about graduation logistics, since he can't walk very far, and we just got an email from the University about all that. It's funny-- the first two years, our daughter lived on campus, and the end-of-year communication was all, "Be out no later than Friday! There's no room for you people with all the commencement stuff going on, and don't expect to park here!" And then this year:

University: Parking will be extremely restricted the entire weekend. We'll be closing several lots and access roads. You weren't planning to come on-campus, were you?
Us: Um... yes? For commencement?
University: Good luck with that! It'll suck. We hate you all.
Us: Wait a minute...

I would really like to just spend time with our daughter after her graduation. I have no interest in the actual ceremony (I didn't even go to mine!), and she really doesn't either. But most of her friends are going to the general outdoor ceremony (the clusterf**k) instead of the sub-college one, so that's the one she's doing. And thus, so are we. :( It'll be 3-4 hours in the sun, sunblocked, dressed up, and sweating, AND I'll probably still get a little sunburned before it's over. Ughhhh.

I don't think she'll even be sitting with us, so both our son and I will be tempted to hang out in an air-conditioned building and watch him play Goat Simulator on his phone or something. ;)

I expect we'll Uber there to help the transportation issue (along with half the crowd, probably). I just hope we can get HSH close enough to the seating area. At least the walking issue is more about fatigue than pain these days. His hip replacements have definitely helped part of the equation. :)

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
21 May 2019 @ 12:53 am
I didn't mean to fall off the planet again. Seems I'm always about a week-and-a-half behind!

The holiday aspect of Mother's Day weekend was fairly low-key, what with both kids being off at college. It was very much like most weekends, except with flowers and an unexpected bicycling snafu.

Remember the coughing problem I mentioned a few weeks ago, where I would spend so much time clearing my throat that it felt like I was drowning for wetness and lack of air? That got really, really bad while bicycling last Saturday and Sunday. I slowed way down a couple of times to recuperate, but it didn't help at all. Both rides were exhausting gasp-fests where I couldn't maintain anything like my usual speed, and I was wiped out afterwards.

The change felt like it happened overnight, and it reminded me of an episode of walking pneumonia I had fifteen years ago. By Monday, I was tired and gasping from just driving to work and sitting at my desk, and didn't have enough air to sing in the car. I emailed my doctor and talked to the advice nurse, and went in for a chest x-ray and blood tests. The x-ray was clear, which surprised me-- I'd started to think the gunk in my lungs might be coming up from below, rather than draining from above.

More health-mystery blatherCollapse )

Thanks to more late rain AGAIN, I was only able to get outside to ride last Friday and today, and I definitely feel better though not yet 100%. I've certainly overcome some core incompetencies involving the use of inhalers. I have to concentrate every time I use it, but now I mostly inhale the blast, rather than blocking half of it with my tongue or pulling it out too soon and letting it vaporize the air. \o?

So, to summarize: way too much of the wrong kind of excitement, which I hope is on the way out now. And I'd better scale back my mileage pledge for May Is Bike Month, because it was clearly too ambitious vs. what the reality is shaping up to be. :O

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
09 May 2019 @ 02:16 pm
This is actually for last weekend, even though the new one is nearly here...

The big news was being voted Co-Winner of LJ Idol for the Literary Prize Fight mini-season. It still hardly seems real. Sonreir and I are joining a terrifically talented and humbling group of people who have won past rounds, and I'm in awe of all of them. :O

In lesser news, HalfshellHusband and I haven't been out on a weekend date in ages. I've spent the last 5-6 weeks writing Idol entries all weekend (as did HSH, up until 2 weeks ago), and just haven't had the time. Last Saturday, I couldn't commit to anything in case there was another write-off and I had to spend the evening on that!

What I DID do last weekend, besides nearly jump-start an ulcer over the Idol vode, was yard work. We have a TON of bulbs in our yard that the previous owner planted. Most are paperwhites, which flower in the winter. Afterward, the leaves keep growing and growing until they flop over onto the lawn or other plants and block out their sunlight and prevent them from getting watered by the sprinklers. \o?

I usually cut them back around March, and then pull off the dead leaves in June or so. Thanks to Idol and the recurring weekends of late rain that went on forEVER, I didn't start in on that first chore until the end of April. The leaves are about 20" now, so you really have to wrestle with them just to trim them. My equipment for this chore is a cheap serrated knife and a pair of rubber gloves, because these things slime when you cut them. God, do they ever slime. And after about 15 minutes, that sap turns sticky—so you'll be trying to remove weeds between the plants, and then you can't shake the weeds off the gloves. Ook.

I cut back everything along the walkway (the most crucial sprinkler area) two weeks ago, then last weekend I started on the huge circle in the middle of the lawn. 2 1/2 hours of work, and I only finished 3/4ths of it!

I decided last year that I was going to dig up and remove virtually all the paperwhites (and the gazillion clumps of white gladiola bulbs in other parts of the front yard). First, because all the flowers are white, and they're not worth the grief. If they were daffodils, maybe, but no. But what really drove that decision was that these bulbs are what's keeping us from putting down landscape fabric and groundcover. Instead, we have bare dirt everywhere and have to battle epic weeds all year long. I'm sick of it.

Somehow, though, I didn't get that done. Last spring, I removed semi-rotted roots from long-dead trees, added back good dirt, and then put in new plants. Some of which are now dead. :O By the time I was done with that, all of the paperwhite leaves were gone, which makes it hard to find the bulbs. I did dig some of them up (and some gladiolas, too) while planting new things, but there are SO many more to go. I only have about 4-6 weeks left before the leaves are gone again, during which time we'll be gone Memorial Day weekend and then again in Mid-June for our oldest's college graduation. My chances of getting much done are not looking good!

Plus, we fianlly visited the nursery last weekend and got some new plants that need to go in. Not as many as I'd hoped—what's available really varies, even though you definitely want to plant everything no later than... now. SOOOoooooo...

Oh hey, remember my talking about random-juke-box-brain last week? I woke up Monday morning with Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" in my head for no good reason (I'm not really a fan, and I've probably heard it fewer than 10 times). It was on repeat until something HalfshellHusband said kicked off "Start It Up," a song that is high on my Hate list and contains at least 50% more Jagger-mouth than virtually any other Stones song. So I immediately inflicted it on HSH, out of revenge. I mean, it was only fair, right? :O

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
06 May 2019 @ 01:57 pm
If you were wondering what happened with that final LJ Idol 24-hour-writeoff vote on Saturday, it ended in another tie!

At that point, the other finalist and I individually emailed the Idol poobah and asked whether we could please finish the season as co-winners, given that the voters' opinions seemed pretty clear.

In a stroke of luck and mercy, he decided to let the tie stand-- for only the second time in all of the Idol regular and mini-seasons.

So, sonreir and I are the co-winners of the LJ Idol Literary Prize Fight mini-season.

Thank you all so much for your help, your support, and your extreme patience. I couldn't have done it without you. \o/

♥ ♥ ♥

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
04 May 2019 @ 12:48 pm
The voting window for the LJ Idol sudden-death write-off ends early tonight at 10pm EDT. If you haven't already voted, would you mind taking a moment to support me in the poll? Thank you! I really appreciate it. :)

So, no bike ride yesterday. I went down to the wire finishing that Idol story, which was also how Monday went. :O

But by yesterday's deadline, it was too late to even bike in the garage before dinner! I walked around the neighborhood for a bit after dinner instead, stretching my legs and feeling the nice air and smelling all sorts of things in bloom. And noticing that the neighbors across the back fence apparently are not the only ones who like to string large klieg party lights around the yard and sit out under them after dark. But what about the mosquitos?

I'll go biking in a bit this afternoon, and possibly go around the yard and do another survey de la mort. Because the last one was two weeks ago, and things may have gotten worse since then-- and I'm just talking about the new landscaping from last year! There are a couple of spots where if there weren't a lone buried twig or a plastic stake, I would have no idea I had even planted something there earlier.

All of that is a completely separate issue from other basic yard maintenance that needs to happen. I cut back a bunch of bulb plants last weekend, because their leaves just grow and grow until they block the path of the sprinklers. But I didn't get to all of them. And now? I'm looking out the window at the ornamental plum tree, whose branches are heavy and sagging and waiting to snap... They're heavy because they're covered with little cherry-sized sour plums. This variety is supposed to be non-fruiting! But after the first five years, some strain of "You're not the boss of me!" kicked off, and it's been putting out useless fruit ever since.

If I'd wanted that kind of grief, I would have planted a tree with good plums!

So, what are all of you up to this weekend?

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