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05 March 2015 @ 12:52 pm
LJ Idol Season Nine: "Red" (Home Game)  
Red
idol season nine | week 40 | 483 words
Wolf Ticket (Home game)

x-x-x-x-x

What I'd heard was, you go around the back of the old pine grove just before the full moon, and there's a guy who'll sell you a day's worth.

Nothing permanent or complicated, or even all that crazy. You buy a dose, take it somewhere secret and safe, and the next night, you use it. It lasts from one moon to the next, about all anyone can handle anyway. When it's over, you're already dreaming about the next time.

Everyone goes in thinking they'll try it just once, just to see what it's like, but then you get hooked. Nothing else comes anywhere close, and believe me, I have tried.

The first thing that happens is that all the colors change. They aren't just different, they give everything more depth—so it all looks more real. You can see into the shadows, too, see things moving that you might only have sensed before. Then you start to hear things—tiny things—you hadn't noticed, maybe even sounds from the other side of the forest. It's incredible.

Smells become more intense, and more interesting. You can almost taste the air, and by then you really want to—you want everything at once, everything now. The world is vivid and amazing, and you could practically eat it alive. The air is cooler, the earth softer, and you feel so swift and powerful that you run just for the joy of it, just to feel the spring of the dirt beneath your feet until you finally grow breathless. You move with ease and grace, so unlike how you usually feel, and with an aggressive sense of purpose that is bigger than you are.

Then a red haze rises up inside you, and that might just be the last thing you remember.

Later, you'll come back to yourself as if awakening from a long, dreamless sleep. There might be blood on your mouth, and a sick feeling in your gut. You might return home to find that a family member, a friend, a neighbor, is now missing or even dead. You'll try not to think about that too much.

You'll swear then that you will never buy the stuff again, no matter how desperately it calls to you. The whole thing is just too dangerous, the consequences much too serious.

That will not be the first time you've made that promise.

But after moons and moons have passed, the urge will come over you once more. You'll want to experience it all again, the hyperawareness and the added power, because you can never get enough of it and you never will.

You'll hate yourself for it, for all the things you know you've done. Calling them coincidence is a lie you can't even use to convince yourself.

The truth is that once in a while, everyone wants to be the wolf.

Sometimes, that even includes the sheep.


--/--
 
 
 
kick_galvanic, zagzagael, skull_theatrebleodswean on March 5th, 2015 08:55 pm (UTC)
Ooooooooooooooooh! This is EXCELLENT!!! A wolf ticket to ride! Great work here, your descriptions of the wolf high were palpable!
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on March 5th, 2015 08:57 pm (UTC)
I cannot believe how fast you read this!

The prompt just sent me to this idea right away-- not exactly crack, but if there were a semi-tragic version of crack, this might be it.

Glad you liked it, and thanks for reading!

Edited at 2015-03-05 09:05 pm (UTC)
Donnellejexia on March 6th, 2015 02:17 am (UTC)
This has great imagery - you're always good at that.

I especially liked "The world is vivid and amazing, and you could practically eat it alive. "
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on March 6th, 2015 02:34 am (UTC)
Thank you!

That was one of those things that struck me as being very different in being a wolf rather than a sheep. That enhanced hearing, smell, and taste would be such a rush if it wasn't what you're used to, and that added feeling of strength and power might give you exactly that viewpoint of taking what you want, when you want it, because the wolf simply can.

Now I feel a little creepy for having gotten into that so much, but I blame it on the story. It's better than thinking in 'frog'!
Donnellejexia on March 6th, 2015 02:38 am (UTC)
...mmm...flies...
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on March 6th, 2015 04:17 am (UTC)
And swampiness. And cool, cool water and refreshing rain, and fat, tasty minnows.

That totally was a story, and it took me weeks to shake that frog POV out of my head. :O
i_17bingoi_17bingo on March 8th, 2015 07:47 am (UTC)
When it's over, you're already dreaming about the next time.

What an awesome idea--black-market lycanthropy! This starts out sounding like fun, but then you gradually ramp up the horror of it, and it doesn't sound like fun anymore...
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on March 9th, 2015 06:57 am (UTC)
I liked the idea that the whole "wolf high" could be so similar to many drug experiences, right down to the point where you're doing things you regret later and yet you're already addicted.

That the sheep was the addict was just an extra twist of the knife. ;)
cindy: wolf chorus (by bunnymcfoo)tsuki_no_bara on March 9th, 2015 04:58 am (UTC)
i meant to read this a lot sooner than now. >.< and i love it! the addiction of the wolf shifter. the descriptions of the world from the wolf's pov are really great - and you can understand how someone could get addicted to it - and the last couple lines especially are fabulous.
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphorshalfshellvenus on March 9th, 2015 06:58 am (UTC)
Thank you! I really wanted to work the parallels between any drug-enhanced high and addiction and the actual prompt here-- the idea of becoming the wolf, getting caught up in all of the "more" and being unable to quit...

even when what you're doing is all the more wrong because of who you are. :O