The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
05 January 2020 @ 10:49 am



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Prison Break Fanfiction
I write primarily non-shipper general fiction, and some Lincoln/Michael slash pieces as well. Yes, I know they’re brothers… and no, I normally wouldn’t be writing brothercest. That said, if it’s not your thing then please stick to the General Fiction section.

                  Prison Break Gen Fiction                      Prison Break Slash Fiction

Supernatural Fanfiction
Supernatural also deals with two brothers, who in this case are bound together in the pursuit of demons and vengeance. An excellent overview of this show and its characters can be found here.
                  Supernatural Gen Fiction                      Supernatural Slash Fiction

Other Fanfiction: Iron Man, Die Hard 4, Chuck, White Collar, Burn Notice, Reaper, and more

Original Fiction and Non-Fiction Stories: Miscellaneous Original Fiction // Real LJ Idol Season 8 // LJ Idol Exhibit A // LJ Idol Exhibit B // LJ Idol Season 9


 
 
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
21 May 2015 @ 10:45 pm
This morning featured new noises, halfway between a "shriek" and a "gronk," that sounded as if someone was torturing a whale. The sound was so piercing, it went right through the earplugs. There was a white, county utility truck parked out on the street... Please let this not be some kind of new garbage truck. The current ones are loud enough!

I went out for Chinese food with people from the office yesterday, and had very good szechuan pork. Spent the rest of the afternoon in the usual fashion, which is to say jonesing for chocolate with mint. I don't know why Chinese food does that to me, but it's consistent. Every.single.time. :O

So, after that comment the other day about Battle Creek slash, I went looking for some. Let me just say that of the various things at AO3, I did not expect so many stories to be in Russian and Chinese, nor the explosion of things like wing-fic, vampire AUs, etc. I suppose I should have, because fanfic, but really? Damn.

I did find a really marvelous story worth sharing. This isn't the way I would have thought of Milt, but the author totally persuaded me, and Russ? Is so very Russ. Crabby, aggravating, and yet you can't help liking him. The style is decidedly unfluffy slash (again, Russ), very masculine and realistic. Really good storytelling, and a very satisfying read:

Upon My Liar's Chair (R) by Lessandra.

Another conversation the other day made me think of something else I should rec, for Justified fans. This story came out during the nvrleaveharlan "Hillbilly Remix" challenge. The author really captures Dickie Bennett here, from his seemingly half-crazy non-sequitur-based conversations to his underlying wiliness, and it's funny and perfect:

Tiger, Tiger by lymricks.

A three-day weekend is coming up here in the States, but I didn't get around to making plans for HalfshellHusband and me to go out of town. My follow-through is just awful these days. :( What will all of you be up to?

 
 
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
The day started off questionably: a seemingly nightlong dream about repeatedly being kept awake and not getting enough sleep (which makes you feel as if that's what has actually happened), and then waking up for real to discover I'd set the alarm an hour late. Ah, Monday. :\

The weekend was less rushed than the previous. We watched The Penguins of Madagascar, which for the most part was glorious insanity. I mistook Benedict Cumberbatch's voice for Kelsey Grammar trying to be British (not for the first time), though Cumberbatch has a more consistently deep velvet tone than Grammar. That really was not the point of the movie, though. Penguins, halfbaked schemes, and serendipitous outcomes are the movie's selling points.

We saw the season finale of Grimm, which had no surprises. I can't get worked up over it, though if the show tries to redeem Adalind any farther, I will be peeved. Move away! The finale of The Blacklist satisfied some little corner of my barely-acknowledged shipper heart (you heard nothing here, nothing), and broke open all kinds of possibilities for next season.

Battle Creek is not over, thank goodness, though I'm suddenly wondering if there's slash for this series yet. I'm betting yes: Milt saves Russ from his own cynicism through the power of handsomeness and squeaky-clean sincerity. I'm totally serious. :)

In real-world news, I just now ordered graduation announcements for our daughter (choosing the ones I can pick up tomorrow, because I'm that far behind). My wedding anniversary is in two days and I'm wholly unprepared for that and the coming 3-day weekend, and no summer plans have been made. Please, let the water-treading slow down at work so I can get some sort of handle on life again. :O

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
Title: Professionalism on Hiatus
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Sam, Dean (Gen)
Rating: PG
Summary: Not every stakeout is a winner.
Author's Notes: For mdlaw, who requested Supernatural and "cold."

x-x-x-x-x

"I'm freezing," Sam said.

Dean just watched the clearing. "So get the blanket."

"Can't. I burned it, remember? That demon in Astoria slimed it." Sam shivered. "I hate November."

Dean sighed. "There's a space blanket in the car, try that."

Sam went and got it. "This thing's thinner than Kleenex." He wrapped the blanket tightly around them both. "Hey. That's better."

"Yeah. Though I feel like a Shake-and-Bake drumstick…"

"Great. I'm never eating that again."

Five minutes passed. "I'm hungry," Sam said. "Think this thing's coming?"

"Nah."

"Let's get burgers, then."

"Actually," Dean said, "Right now I'm totally craving KFC!"


--/--

 
 
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
16 May 2015 @ 11:44 pm
Title: Relics (A story in the S.A.T.E.D. universe)
Author: HalfshellVenus
Author's Notes: For alien_writings and the prompt of "Bubbles."

x-x-x-x-x

I'm not saying we play at the dump, exactly—Ma would have my hide for that, with all the filth and germs. But we do poke around there now and then, wondering about the things people throw away.

I found a water-filled container yesterday, with buildings and white flakes inside. I brought it to Ma and asked what it was, and she just stared.

"A snow globe," she finally said.

"But what's in it? A city?"

She nodded. "Paris."

I don't understand why so many things from Before make Ma sad, but it seemed like this was one of them.

"Is Paris real?" I asked.

"Yes—at least, it used to be. Your father and I went there on our honeymoon." She blinked real fast for a bit, then said, "Now go throw that thing away."

I didn't want to—it was pretty and I'd never seen anything like it—but I did what Ma told me to, even if it felt like a mistake.

Ma was quiet the rest of the day, and it seemed like something was wrong but she wouldn't say what.

She seems better today, like she's forgotten whatever was bothering her.

I haven't.

I keep remembering that look on her face when she saw what I had.

I think just maybe that snow globe used to be hers.


--/--

 
 
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
11 May 2015 @ 11:22 pm
I hope those of you who could had a happy Mother's Day, either as mother or child. The kids and I layed miniature golf, and last night's dinner was red Thai curry and strawberry shortcake. Yum!

The whole weekend just flew by. I was still drinking my Saturday morning coffee when our daughter announced that none of her friends were available to walk across the Golden Gate Bridge with her, and asked me to go with her. She and her friends created an "adventure/experience" list a few years ago, and random things like this are on it. So there went Saturday! We came across intermittent traffic jams all the way to the bridge (it took more than three hours), and our daughter missed the exit so we had to cross over and make the journey from the city side. Windy, but great views. Afterward, we went to to Paxti's for pizza (that was on her list too). I'm a "thin crust" kind of person, but this was Chicago deep dish and really good. She asked me to drive home (the traffic jam on the way out of San Francisco was only half-an-hour long). That trip seemed to take forever. My right hamstring cramps up a lot these days, and I'm periodically getting a feeling on the right side that I will now (for the first time in public) call "hip rot." Stuff hurt. But the overall trip was worth it.

I also discovered that our daughter has recently switched over to the Australian Male version of Siri, and since she feels weird calling him Siri now, I renamed him Steve. Or, "Stayve," if you prefer. He does better with street names than the GPS my husband uses (of the famed "LACK-a-shore" for Lakeshore, and "Ter-will-A-zher" for Terwilliger). Teh pronunciation of "Bay" as "Beh" was kind of confusing, though.

I got no chores or much of anything else done this weekend, which was kind of nice. The main difficulty is that work is so tiring nowadays that the weekends already seem too quick, and this one was over before it started.

In other random news, I still have not tackled the porch spiders. The shop vac is losing suction, so it will have to be cleaned beforehand, and that is a messy, disgusting chore that I really hate. Cobwebs and bug fragments are in there, and the phobias say, "Maybe HalfshellHusband will get to it first..."

Annnd, for those who like to keep tabs on these things, Crazy Castle Guy on I-80 is either selling his bulldozer or is offering up the most expensive woodpile ever.

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
06 May 2015 @ 11:46 pm
HalfshellHusband tried to convince me last night that the orthodontist wanted to pull out some of our son's molars. That made no sense—they'd been part of the orthodontia, and you don't randomly remove molars. Plus, they were done coming in. Wisdom teeth are a different story. People remove those all the—

HalfshellHusband: "Wisdom teeth, yes. Wait, what did I say before?"

I can't remember if our daughter is supposed to get all of hers out too (and we're just waiting for them to get closer to the surface), or whether only some are coming out. She had two teeth pulled for braces, which still kind of puzzles me. I had four bicuspids removed when I was a kid, because in those days, all the teeth that "lined up" in the bite went if there wasn't enough room. I don't see how having more on the top or bottom could be good, but that's what she wound up with. Possibly, two wisdom teeth will be added as well.

We might get some rain tomorrow, which would be welcome despite leading to garage-biking for me. It would have been a wonderful weather for a ride today, but my boss has scheduled his weekly meeting right in my early-afternoon bicycling window. I regret it every Wednesday. :(

Friday, though... that has outdoor possibilities. *fingers crossed*

Questions I want answered without endless dinking around on Google: who wrote the theme song to XYZ (eg., "Battle Creek" and "Backstrom" at the moment), and are those real songs I can buy somewhere? If not, WHY not? The answer to the first is Brandan Calhoon and apparently "No." The second? Still looking. :(

 
 
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
05 May 2015 @ 12:14 pm
I checked in on the NFL Draft results all last week, to see which of the graduating Oregon Ducks players had been picked up. Sort of like making sure they all got good homes. :)

The QB, Marcus Mariota, was the second pick—behind another quarterback, which really surprises me. Versatile, strong, fast. What more did people want? But maybe it was serendipitous. During the 2014 season, Tennessee Titans' fans were running a "Suck for the Duck" campaign and rooting for their team to continuing playing badly enough to get the top first-round draft-pick so they could draft Mariota. They got the second pick, but they DID get Mariota. He definitely knows they wanted him. :O

Defensive Lineman Arik Armstead was picked in Round 1 (higher than anyone anticipated) by the 49ers, with much celebration around here as he's a "local" boy. The left Offensive Tackle, Jake Fisher, was chosen in Round 2. Interestingly enough, a mid-season injury probably improved his draft chances. While he was out for two games, Mariota got sacked 7 and 5 times, and as soon as he returned, Oregon's offense was back on track. Talk about a clear demonstration of value! Finally, an offensive lineman who is NOT an "unsung hero."

Oregon's center was picked in the third round, and cornerback Ifo Ekpre-Olomu in the 7th. SEVENTH. He was injured in a practice game late in the season, but was also considered the #1 CB in the NCAA. So... huh?

I wish them all luck, and the four other guys who signed as free agents. That was one talented graduating class!

Other news: I went in search of a couple of Valerie Wellington songs yesterday, and discovered that she had died back in in 1993 from a cerebral aneurysm. What a shock. She had a glorious blues voice, and the two tracks I was looking for aren't available as singles from Amazon: Cold, Cold Feeling and Smokestack Lightning. The first, you can hear on youtube.. Gives me the shivers. Haven't found the second, and who knows what's on iTunes since you have to download it to search the Apple store. I hate Apple. So sad that she was gone so soon. She was really something. ♥

 
 
The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
04 May 2015 @ 12:17 pm
I can't believe the weekend is over already. Feels like I spent the entire thing doing chores, and still didn't finish all the ones I intended to. PorchSpiders:1, Me:0.

OTOH, two hours of unplanned yardwork both Saturday and Sunday. That's a big part of where my time goes. :(

For some brain-glitchy reason, I went out on Sunday morning and ran in my everyday shoes with the orthotic inserts rather than my running shoes!!! They're both Asics, so I must have gotten confused. Also, morning. \o?

Luckily enough, no injuries or major issues. Possibly even good, other than further pounding those poor inserts (which are overdue to be replaced). I ran 4.7 of the targeted 5.0 miles, with a couple of stops in the last mile. I wish I didn't overheat quite so easily.

In long-term planning, I should be figuring out when/if we can go anywhere this summer and to where... except that the kids' internship/volunteer schedules still aren't squared away. My husband says, "Probably late May" for our son. Given that school ends on June 4th, that is really unhelpful!

All right, back to the grind. I hope you had a more exciting weekend than I did...

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
02 May 2015 @ 10:25 pm
If you thought yesterday's reference to spiders seemed to have a "dogwhistle" tone to it, you were right. The audience there was other people who also live in hot, dry places.

For reasons of nefariousness coincidence, we usually can only see a spider's back, not its underside. Once you've seen enough black widows, though, you become familiar with the overall shape and sheen of them, and any spider that looks like that is almost certainly a black widow. If it's brown, it might be a brown widow—or a mutant on its way to becoming a black widow, so kill it anyway!

I seriously hate how plentiful those little monsters are around Sacramento...

This got me rememering again this morning that, while it is a lovely book and a classic, I sometimes feel (unpopular opinion alert!) that Charlotte's Web is also primarily pro-spider propaganda. If you don't believe me, ask your friendly neighborhood arachnophobe. Yick!

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