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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
05 January 2020 @ 10:49 am


Prison Break Fanfiction
I write primarily non-shipper general fiction, and some Lincoln/Michael slash pieces as well. Yes, I know they’re brothers… and no, I normally wouldn’t be writing brothercest. That said, if it’s not your thing then please stick to the General Fiction section.

                  Prison Break Gen Fiction                      Prison Break Slash Fiction

Supernatural Fanfiction
Supernatural also deals with two brothers, who in this case are bound together in the pursuit of demons and vengeance. An excellent overview of this show and its characters can be found here.
                  Supernatural Gen Fiction                      Supernatural Slash Fiction

Other Fanfiction: Iron Man, Die Hard 4, Chuck, White Collar, Burn Notice, Reaper, and more

Original Fiction and Non-Fiction Stories: Miscellaneous Original Fiction // Real LJ Idol Season 8 // LJ Idol Exhibit A // LJ Idol Exhibit B // LJ Idol Season 9

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
21 June 2016 @ 11:35 am
So, HalfshellHusband now has a pacemaker. When his cardio tests were run yesterday to see whether he needed one, the doctor decided it was inevitable and that he might as well do the surgery that day, since he had time.

It's in, and everything is looking good. Makes us feel slightly less bad about the hip replacement being postponed for a month due to wanting to run those tests. Having a pacemaker at HSH's age (60) is unnerving, but I guess we're lucky that treatment exists.

He's mostly feeling pretty good right now. I'm tired and stressed (I ate an entire bag of chocolate chips last night—augh). So, have some humor for all of us:

Playing dress-up with the Queen of England. Bat-queen to the rescue!

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
20 June 2016 @ 12:16 am
I made the trip to San Diego and back last week to pick up our daughter from college, and it was about what I'd expected. Looooong and tiring.

I downloaded episodes of Night Vale onto HalfshellHusband's mp3 player for entertainment (I was about 30 episodes behind, somewhere in late 2014. Wow). Things were going okay until about 3 or 3 1/2 hours into the trip, when the back of my right thigh started to cramp. That happened on the solo trip coming back from San Diego last September. Augh—I don't know why that has become such a problem. I was feeling desperate, so I took a mini ice-block from the lunch bag cooler and wedged it underneath my leg. That actually helped. Not sure whether it was the digging into the cramped muscle or some kind of "gating" theory in action, but it did feel better. I swallowed aspirin and No Doz, and was still slapping myself in the face from about Bakersfield onward. It seemed like I made pretty good time, but I got to the outskirts of LA just before 3pm, and it took me two more hours to get to Forest Hill.

I do not know how people stand living in and around LA, I really don't.

I hit San Diego's rush hour too, so door-to-door the trip down was about 10 hours. The hotel was kind of iffy (overpriced, considering), and the gym was worthless. No customer-usable A/C, no fans, and the stationary bicycle was broken. I used the elliptical, and made it to 22 minutes before I was too overheated to go on. Whoopee. The office gym has one in front of a fan, so my usual workout is 55 minutes. Suckage.

It seemed like I was awake all night (except for dreams about Hillary Clinton, who was in a very cheerful tour-guide mood). I packed up the next morning, got lost getting back to the freeway (diagonal streets are a menace, and the hotel was on a hairpin diagonal), and then got lost trying to find our daughter's dorm. Yayyyy! She was pretty solidly packed when I got there, though, and we got the car loaded and her room vacuumed and her goodbyes said in about 90 minutes.

The return slog... she did a lot of driving, thank goodness, including the mysteriously slow trip back through LA. I drove enough that I eventually crushed that ice-block thingy until it started to leak, which I knew was a risk. We got home around 8pm, so only a nine-hour trip coming back. Glllarghhh. I'm so glad that's over.

I was kind of a zombie last weekend, and we'd gotten some bad news about HSH's surgery. His cardiologist finally decided to become interested in last October's fainting episode that led to his bike accident, and so she started running tests and more tests (no answers there), and now he has to delay the hip surgery while he gets tested to see if he needs a pacemaker first. Probably not, but I can understand why they're being cautious. HOWEVER... the time to do that was about six months ago. So, at the moment his hip replacement surgery has been postponed for a month, and the expiration on pain tolerance leading up to it ended about a week ago. :( :(

That's all the real news for now, though you'll be happy to know I've located some spare building blocks from the kids' baby toys, and those will be used on my next long road trip. At least they won't leak...

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
07 June 2016 @ 01:37 pm
... noisy and a little frenetic. The boys all cleaned up after their all-night video-game extravaganza pretty well, and no major damage was done. The grownups were worn out, but we survived, and the boys all had fun. Then our son had a volunteer orientation to go to (which we didn't realize was six hours long--wow), followed by going camping the next day with the same friends.

This was to be a one-night camp-out, which evolved from backpacking about five miles into the Desolation Wilderness (in June. Above the snow line. With a pair of Eagle scouts and mostly inexperienced others), and became car-camping at a nearby lake. ;) Much saner. I did text him about staying on the trails and open spaces, because of rattlesnakes. He said, "But we're at Folsom Lake!"

Meaning, he has not been paying attention to my ongoing stories of nearly or actually running over snakes on the bike path a couple of times every year. The bike path that connects to that lake, and is the same general habitat. Derrrr...

Other news: I wasted more than two hours messing with iTunes the weekend before last, in which it would not allow any editing of my iPod playlists or downloading new tunes. After Googling for help on the web, I was able to successfully downgrade to an earlier iTunes release (the 12.xx.xx apparently is feature-free, apart from using it as an online radio). I'll try to get new NightVale episodes on my iPod tonight, for the drive to San Diego, and if that doesn't work I'll be borrowing HalfshellHusband's mp3 player to do that. So much Apple-Hate!

Oh, speaking of the trip south... later in the same day as that last post, our daughter texted me that I should come on Friday instead. Not because she was feeling any less rude or self-entitled, but because she'd discovered that the campus will be flooded with people coming in for graduation, and so moving out on Saturday would be a terrible idea. Okay, then. *whatevs*

We watched The Lady In The Van last weekend (because Maggie Smith), and quite liked it. We're also about 8 episodes into Better Call Saul, which we liked much better than expected. Mike Ehrmentraut FTW! "Five-O" was such a terrific episode for him. We also like Kim a great deal, and Jimmy's unusual friendship with her.

Someday, I imagine that we'll get back into watching Homeland, but those episodes were on the external hard drive that mysteriously decided to become nonfunctional, and I have yet to rescue it. Keep on hoping! It's like denial, but in prettier clothes!

So, what are you all up to?

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
04 June 2016 @ 07:06 pm
One of these is already underway—we're hosting one of the all night video-game extravaganzas our son and his friends like to have. Six teenage boys, boatloads of junk food, and mainly... mayhem in the house for some 19-20 hours. AUGHHHH!

For introverts, like HalfshellHusband and me, this kind of frenzy is basically a version of Hell.

Dread #2 is next weekend's drive to San Diego to pick up the oldest from college. She has to be out by noon on Saturday, and mentioned a week ago that I might want to leave on Thursday instead of Friday. Then I talked to her this Wednesday: "No! Don't come on Friday! I'll be saying goodbye to all my friends, I don't want you here! I will not see you before Saturday." Then she announced her new plan, which was for me to show up at 6 am (I'm not even AWAKE until about 8 am) and pack up the car so we can leave before that noon cutoff. After driving for 9-11 hours the previous day (depending on how traffic goes). I told her she needed to rethink that. And that I am not her sherpa. ;) She's so considerate of her friends, and then there's this kind of behavior with her own family: I don't want to see you but let me make some major new demands.

And she wonders why I call her on that kind of self-entitled behavior. :O

Dread #3 is the weekend afterward. God, what a summer this will be. The good news is that HalfshellHusband is getting a new hip! He's a couple of months overdue now, pain-wise, but he wanted to schedule it for when school got out so the kids would be around to help. The bad news is the two months or so of rehab and all the time he'll be stuck in bed (except for his trips outside to practice walking). We can't really go anywhere as a family this summer, and we couldn't do anything earlier because he was in too much pain. Needless to say, it'll be a long, unpleasant time for him, and I'm feeling stressed out and trapped in anticipation of it all (and in the extra work that is looming) :(

He's a little worried about the pain management plan afterwards, BUT, if this goes the way the previous hip replacement did... the loss of pain from the arthritis itself will dwarf the residual effect from the surgery. It has been that bad.

All right, back to the insanity. I'm not sure my ear plugs are going to cut it tonight. :O

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
31 May 2016 @ 12:22 pm
Title: Dancing Shoes
Fandom: Traditional Fairytales
Rating: G
Summary: Sweet slumber eludes them all.
Author's Notes: For the writerverse challenge #4 Bingo Table of Doom, this is "Till the Street Lights Came On."


Spirited away from their beds each night, they slipped through the secret door and down the stairs into the world below.

Whose summons they heeded did not matter, and the lack of wanting changed nothing. Night after night, the princesses made the journey underground, traveling through strange forests and across a river to dance with princes from some unknown other kingdom.

Each day, they were wearier than the last.

Why it began and whether it would end, they did not know. Perhaps some knight or wizard might find them and set things right.

Perhaps that had already happened, and this was the result:

Not the mercy so desperately wished for, but a punishment in the guise of gaiety.

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
23 May 2016 @ 11:46 pm
Title: Bon Appétit
Fandom: White Collar
Characters: Mozzie and Neal (Gen)
Rating: PG
Summary: You can always do things the normal way, but where's the fun in that?
Note: I missed the deadline on the 24-turnaround and then some, but this was written for runthecon and the prompt of "Legal crimes."


"What is that monstrosity in your living room?" Mozzie asked.

"God, not this again." Neal shut his apartment door, and placed the sauvignon blanc in the refrigerator to chill. "You were the one who introduced me to Danish modern."

"Yes, as an aesthetic." Mozzie surveyed the half-finished painting on Neal's easel, which appeared to be Portofino. "But you have to eventually sit in chairs. That one is designed to create new customers for chiropractors."

"It's not that bad," Neal said.

"Really? Have you ever spent an evening reading a book in it?"

"Well, no," Neal admitted. He put a green apple on the cutting board. "Brie?"

"Yes, please." Mozzie examined the chair again. "It doesn't even go with the décor."

"I'm willing to give it time." Read more...Collapse )

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
Another weekend got away from me, with too little done. Our son had friends over both days for various school projects (only one of which we were at all expecting), so there was mayhem. That tends to frazzle me a little.

I'm trying to keep up the mileage for May is Bike Month. Friday was windy, but better than being in the garage? Sunday wasn't too bad. Yesterday it was windy near my office—as in, I had to do alternate routes that did not involve so much open exposure to crosswinds on roads with heavy traffic. I have a valuable out-and-back stretch of almost 12 miles that has a lot of traffic, but only one light. It's also in a rural farming area, and when the wind picks up, it's often a side-wind through there. The threat of being gusted into traffic (or, alternatively, the ditch) means there are times I can't use that route. Yesterday was a chore, but since today was going to be windier (!), I did it. Forgot that winds also tend to blow grit into my eyes. Ouch.

The S.F. Chronicle had an article last week about the "Immediate Family" work of photographer Sally Mann. I Googled a bunch of her pictures, and thought of bleodswean, somehow. I'm not sure I would have photographed my children naked quite so late in their lives, but for overall pictures from that collection, there is no question to me that some of them—like Blowing Bubbles—are clearly art. That one is breathtaking. It's a such a vivid mini-portrait of childhood, and shows so clearly why sometimes black-and-white photography is the best choice. Wow.

It also makes me miss the days when my kids were much younger, but then... what doesn't? *sniffle*

I read The Raven King, the final book of The Raven Cycle, and really enjoyed it—though I'm sorry the series is over! Good times... Now I'm reading Kareem Abdul Jabbar's Mycroft Holmes, since HalfshellHusband borrowed it from the library and was finished with it. I'm about 2/3 of the way through.

We watched the premiere of Houdini and Doyle last night. I love Michael Weston, but he is horribly miscast in that. SO modern and slangy-sounding. The modern background music is an abomination (I really dislike the anachronism of that, and it is becoming increasingly common), but we liked the casting of Doyle and of Constable Stratton very much. So, we'll see how it goes.

We're getting caught up on The Blacklist, too. Aram, how I adore you!

Annnnd, I hope the week picks up. Yesterday morning, I arrived at work with an email inbox full of various "fires" and an IM from my daughter that the fan on her laptop had stopped working. This is after the dead power cord and dying battery. Can it please just hang on until after her finals are done? Gah!

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
11 May 2016 @ 11:12 am
I worked at home Monday (due to surprise!Daughter visit), so I'm a little "off" in my sense of what day it is. Mostly important as it relates to regular and new office meetings—wait, that's TODAY? :O

I got voted out of Idol this week, which was disappointing, but I really appreciate all the support and reading and votes from all of you during the journey. I have no Facebook presence, and my f-list isn't very active, so making it into the Top Ten is a challenge! :)

Our son enjoyed Prom, I guess? He went out to dinner with a group of friends, hung out with said friends during the event itself (but did not dance with anyone—I think he worked up the courage near the end to approach the girl he'd originally wanted to ask to Prom, but some other boy swooped in first and that was it). Afterward, the boys played video games all night at one of their houses (this is actually a regular thing for them). I think he had fun overall, and going (which falls into Trying New Things, which he's been reluctant to do since about age 6) was an event all by itself. Also, he had crab sushi for dinner, which was totally new for him. Any sushi. He learned a lesson about asking random girls to Prom, though—for the two boys who had dates, the girls sat on the other side of the table at dinner and then ran off and abandoned the boys entirely once they got to the Prom venue. That's really rude. The girls should have said "No" when asked, if they didn't really want to go with those particular guys.

We finally saw the Sleepy Hollow finale, and there was much hatred. Arghhhh. We'll be taking that off our viewing list next year. Also Grimm, which has become torturous in terms of some of the plot choices. Fan-service ran amok on that show, and was thwarted on Sleep Hollow. I'd like to reverse those results, please!

I got a recommendation from a Dreamwidth friend to try Dick Barton, Secret Agent for my drive to San Diego, and one for Lore from a friend here. I think this will force me to grapple with iTunes and get it working on my PC (it has reached the suicidal stage on HalfshellHusband's Windows XP computer, which previously managed our library and playlists). A comment thread on the previous entry shows exactly how I feel about iTunes. Ugh.

Biking today! Yesterday was a rest day, but overall I'm trying to get the mileage up for May Is Bike Month. My 400-mile goal may be too optimistic for this year (it was based on last year, when I was doing slightly longer rides), BUT... I may as well try!

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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors
09 May 2016 @ 03:15 pm
Just a note: today is the last day to vote for this week's round of LJ Idol. My story is here, and all stories can be found on this page. We're in the Top 10, so every vote counts. Please take a moment to read and vote, if you can. Many thanks!

So, whatever I thought my plans for the weekend might have been, they got shifted by surprise!Daughter visit about half an hour after my last post. :O

There was a possibility of her needing to fly up here for an internship interview, but she was hoping to do that via Skype. I hadn't heard any updates, and then suddenly she was walking in through the back door! What a great Mother's Day present. She has her interview at 3:00 this afternoon, and then is going right to the airport for her flight home. She and I went out to dinner on Saturday night (HalfshellHusband had been out for lunch the day before, which is about all his sodium limitations can take, and The Boy was at the prom). Sunday was similar. She has a LOT of reading to do for schoolwork (about 100 pages a week for History, and she's in 3 other classes that require reading), and there was the comatose sleeping thing. Our son was up all night playing video games with his friends after prom, then he came home around 12:30, then slept, then realized he had taken the wrong rental tux jacket from the friend's house (after I warned him to reassemble it as soon as he took it off), then ran errands, then had an unplanned nap. So, I kind of waited around all day to see if anyone was available, and it was 4:00 when our daughter decided she wanted to go to a coffee shop. I.e., a low-key day, biked in the garage again afterward, and there was too much eating all weekend. But a great visit, and we got to talk a lot. She'll be home in about 4 weeks. :)

Speaking of that... I'll be driving down to San Diego alone to pick her up, and remembering the trip back from taking her there, I will need to make sure that 1) There is No-Doz in the car, and 2) I have some hardcore audio entertainment. I'm not really an audio-books person, but that's probably what it will take. It would be nice to have something where I don't have to keep adding/removing CDs, which I don't want to do while driving through the Central Valley Expanse O' Nothingness. OTOH, my iPod Nano's batteries only seem to last so long. Not sure it will charge off the car battery—it ignores our regular power charger. But save me from the ZZZZzzzzzs! Even slapping myself in the face doesn't always keep me awake, which is pathetic.

So, any recommendations?

ETA: It's... caterpillar season on the bike path. I am become Death, destroyer of worlds worms**.

**Not intentionally, but still... Hey, at least I managed not to run over that baby snake last week! \o?

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